Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire The Lone Ranger, and Tonto.

OK

The Lone Ranger is captured by Indians and told he would be killed in 3 days. The Lone Ranger whispers something in Silver's ear and the horse runs off at a full gallop. Shortly before dusk Silver returns with a beautiful redhead. The Indian chief is impressed and sets up a tee-pee for the Ranger and the redhead for the night.

Next morning the redhead saddles up on Silver and leaves. Once again right at dusk Silver returns with another beauty, this time a brunet. And once again the burnet is allowed to leave with Silver the next morning after spending the night with the Lone Ranger.

And just like the previous day Silver returns with another beauty, this time a blonde. The Indian chief is greatly impressed with the horse, but tells the Lone Ranger that he will still die the next morning. The Lone Ranger obviously upset yells at Silver, "Look you stupid horse, I said to get the POSSE"

Energizer bunny arrested today, charged with battery.

1st time I heard it, I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur.

The REAL Lone Ranger

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were out riding in the brush when they pull up and the Ranger goes into the bushes to relieve himself. Directly, while Tonto is waiting on his horse he hears the Lone Ranger cry out, "Tonto, I've been bit by a rattlesnake. Go get the Doc!"

Tonto gallops to town and tells the Doc. Doc tells Tonto what he must do to save the Lone Ranger.
Tonto gallops back repeating to himself "Suck poison from wound".

When he gets back to the Lone Ranger Tonto says, "Kemosabe, show me your wound" at which the Lone Ranger reveals his swollen member.

The Lone Ranger asks, "What did Doc say to do Tonto?"
Tonto: "Kemosabe, Doc says you're gonna die."

I love The Lenny Bruce take on The Lone Ranger.
It’s on YouTube.