Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Handguns Help me choose something to arm my better half

The answer is clearly a revolver. Under stress it is far more intuitive. Pull trigger and bang. Capacity to defend is more important than a bunch of rounds. My wife has arthritis and is terrible with mechanical things. Between my self and professional instructors she has settled on revolvers. She has two .357s. A ruger sp101 and ruger lcrx loaded with 38 hp both 5 round. She also has two 22s. A 9 shot NEF R92 and smith 8 shot 317 . All are DA snubbies.

The sp101 stays home. The lcr is holstered occasionally when she goes out. The smith is always in a zippered pocket in her purse. The NEF is in holster mounted to her car seat. She is far better prepared to deal with trouble than with my "perfect vision" of what I think she should have.
BTW she also has pepper spray and some sharp stabby things....

A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tommorow. He who hesitates is lost.

The older I get, the less inclined I am to try to convince adults (including family and friends) to do something that they are not otherwise inclined to do. With that out of the way, I have given up on revolvers for occasional shooters. They just do not shoot them well, and they are slow as molasses with them under ideal square-range conditions. The poor performance is amplified with the addition of only minor stress and a moving target (or targets). Under those circumstances, the revolver is just a noisemaker that might hit someone and/or cause them to run away, but that is a terribly irresponsible and dangerous attitude for a mentor and mentee to take.

The occasional or new shooters whom I have taken shooting recently have shot substantially better with semi-autos IF the recoil is within their tolerance level. With a gun that generates not much more recoil than a .22 LR, they tend to do well and learn quickly and even have fun. Once the confidence builds, they progress rapidly. OTOH, most smaller stature or physically weaker shooters aren’t going to pick up a mini-nine and do well with them under stress on 100 rounds a year of ball practice ammo, although I can think of one friend who almost instantly shot my Glock 43 much better than her S&W K and J frames against a charging USPSA target. But, for most occasional shooters, I’d step down to a locked breach .380 in the 1+ pound loaded weight with at least a 3+ inch barrel, and select ammo that favors penetration over expansion. That means no LCP, LCP Max or S&W Bodyguard. It includes guns like the S&W Shield EZ, Glock 42, Sig P365-380, Ruger Security .380. Of those, we have all but the Ruger in the house.

The .380 EZ is a fun gun to shoot. My wife likes hers. My only concern is one raised by Bluedreaux here,
about shooters in his classes almost invariably experiencing malfunctions at some point due to failure to sufficiently depress the grip safety. The Glock 42 has a relatively stiff recoil spring for a .380, making it harder for some to rack, and some experience limp-wrist issues. Aside from that, it is mild recoiling and fun gun. My current favorite is the Sig P365-380, which is an extremely mild and fun gun to shoot. You can use 10 or 12 round magazines. I would love to handle and shoot the Ruger, but I have not had a chance.

These are just my opinions based on my personal experience, which is more limited than other forum members. It appears to be a minority view. I'm no expert, so use them or disregard them as you see fit. Best of luck!

Have to agree. I nice, compact, K-Frame, .38 Special, seems like a good fit. There are plenty of good ones on the used market for reasonable prices.

Sounds like a trip to big, very well stocked gun shop is in order. Maybe even a week day when they aren't so busy.

Let her grip, point & manipulate. Find something she can use & that you approve of.

Higher capacity? JMO, But if she doesn't stop bad things from happening in a round or 3, it's likely there would be no time to fire additional ones. Shy of a successful abduction, most encounters will start & end quickly,,,, unlike the long gun battles in the movies. And, reloading drills should be practiced as much as shooting also. IMO.

Revolvers? Three loaded ones placed around in the living quarters of our house. Another in her SUV. Why, when I have 2 arm loads of Glocks & 1911s, and we both used to shoot USPSA matches with 1911s in 45? Her Rheumatoid. Like your wife, mine can't rack the slide on most auto's these days.

I'd like my wife to carry the Smith 3913 I gave her for Christmas one year, or a GL. 48, 43x etc. I have some Kahr CW's, but she can't rack them. So I'd be happy to see her with with a 317 Smith loaded with 8 CCI Stinger 22's if that's all she'd stand for. It would beat a blank.

Most sensible thing ^ ^ ^ ^ IMO
Most every indoor range in this area has a couple
of dozen different rental handguns to try out for
a nominal fee. It'd be better than buying something
that wasn't suitable/usable and a supply of ammunition
that you would have no use for. And your original
problem would still be staring you in the face.

Good Luck with it

What husbands want for their wives is a non starter. First rule of handguns for wives or girl friends is let them choose it. They are more likely to carry it than one some else chose. Even a 22 or .380 being carried is better than one left at home because they don't like it.

My wife does not like any semi, but she is happy carrying her Lady Smith in 38 sp.

Allow them to choose without experienced guidance, and they will pick the tiniest, cutest, gun they can find.

Does your wife have her CHL because she wanted it or because you wanted her to have it?

I haven't a clue where you're reading bellyaching about the 365 XL.

Probably referring to 320??

You might want to look at some of the 'larger' micro nines out there now. Glock 43X or 48, P365XL, Hellcat Pro, PSA Micro Dagger, etc.

My wife wanted a small revolver 25 years ago. Got an Airweight. Then she decided she wanted something even smaller. Got the early Ruger LCP. Then she decided she wanted something with more capacity. Got an early M&P Compact with safety.

So which gets the nod for everyday? The Airweight. The frame cracked at the crane and S&W replaced it with a +P model. 125gr DoubleTap. Full wadcutters for fun. The M&P rides in her console to repel boarders. 124 gr DoubleTap with an extra mag. The LCP generally hangs out until one of us needs super concealment. 88 gr Hornady Critical Defense. The Airweight suits her needs for close range defense which is the reason she carries. And it’s light enough and concealable enough that she will actually carry it.

I’m no gunfighter and never have been. But based on shooting pistols for near 60 years and carrying regularly for 50 I’d say the best pistol to carry is the one you’re willing to carry. I don’t go for the .22 because of the possibility of the primer failure. But standard velocity wadcutters in a short barreled .38 are easy on the shooter and all I hear from the likes of MacKay they will dissuade evil intent without the very noticeable recoil of +P in a small revolver.

Invest in a box of standard pressure wadcutters, a rental Airweight or similar, and trigger time at 20 feet. That’s my free advice.

Get her some pepper spray

Your problem is that YOU are doing the choosing.
Take her to a range that rents, turn her loose and let her choose.
My wife did that over a period of weeks and ultimately chose a G43

I'd say right off the bat your wife's lack of interest in it all is the first thing you and she have to overcome. You need to build her interest in shooting so she enjoys that aspect first. IMHO go buy a sig 322 yeah a 22lr has fiber optic sights line the dots up an go, it is not a big pistol or a heavy one. After you load the 20 rd mag. Show her how to cycle the slide and the safety lever. Keep it simple use a reactive target at first. If at the end of 100 rds she isn't grinning ear to ear buy her a rape whistle and call it quits. No one can make someone else be responsible for their own safety and well being..sorry if that offends you..mb

We did all that 23 years ago, but with a S&W M18 and a grocery bag full of empty soda cans. It went pretty much like that, too, complete with ear-to-ear grins. That was followed up a few weeks later with a trip to the range with my Model 27 and some .38 Special ammo, after which she wanted to keep the human silhouette target taped to the backside of the door to my reloading room. I gazed at that target more than once with a question in my mind: did I make a terrible mistake?

The woman can shoot. She just isn't an outdoors fan and getting her to the range for a little practice hasn't been an easy sell over the last 20 years. I think she has gone twice.


That's probably it.

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So, I'm not grasping all the insistence on revolvers. When you have someone who you think will not remember a thing about operating a gun under stress other than pulling the trigger, I see no difference whatsoever between a revolver and a Glock 17---just to choose a well understood example---other than the capacity advantage of the Glock (but I AM putting a certain amount of faith in the Glock's reliability without reservation).

I guess you guys are right about letting her choose something herself, though. I won't give her free reign because I don't want her to end up with a pink LCP in .380, as another example---which is probably the worst POS I have ever fired (failed to function miserably with four different ammo types AND three different mags while test firing for a friend). I will steer her toward the Hellcat Pro, Sig P-365, M&P EZ (and we WILL make sure the grip safety is not an issue for her), or maybe something else as well. There's a Cabela's ten miles away and even though I've only been in there once in the past 10 years or so they usually have had a pretty good selection.

Yep, the cutest and lightest. I put all my handguns out and asked the wife to pick the one that she liked best. She handled them all and picked the J-frame m337 PD. The lightest .38 Special +P that S&W ever made at 12 ounces loaded. She won’t carry it, but anyone who ever shot a cap pistol can operate a J-frame and she knows where that one is here in the house.

River Rider, with your wife's hand injury I would skip past the EZ and have her try the Performance Center version of the EZ. Like her, my hand had lasting effects of an injury that make my gril less than perfect. I tried the EZ, and had too many failures to release the grip safety. I know what the problem is, and if I concentrate I can avoid it. But I find that unacceptable in a defensive pistol. The PC version comes with a more prominent grip safety that is less likely to be a problem. I tried one, and it seems to work fine for me. Unfortunately, S&W is not making that part available for owners of the standard EZ. And unfortunately, you're unlikely to find the PC version available as a rental. If you're serious about it and it otherwise fits her requirements, just buy it and find out if it works for her.

Thanks for that info.

She's lefthanded and the injury was to her right hand, but knowing that the PC version has an enhanced grip safety is still a good thing if that's been a problem for women shooters. She'll have to work the slide with her right hand, which is one reason the EZ is attractive...but like I've said, combat reloads and such just aren't likely to be a part of the picture.

We're trying to clear our calendar for a Saturday visit to Cabela's.