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Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment 1akhunter #3113238 06/19/09
Joined: Apr 2004 Posts: 61,130 gone V VAnimrod Campfire Kahuna
VAnimrod Campfire Kahuna V Joined: Apr 2004 Posts: 61,130 gone	Originally Posted by 1akhunter dude what wears a derby nailed it. he already had permission and a steep price to pay, 2x's a freakin year, girl better be able to put a scald on some food and be hell with an iron frickin ridiculous, or did you mistype and it's 2x a day or week? Plus a whole damned bunch.

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment Middlefork_Miner #3113248 06/19/09
Joined: Mar 2004 Posts: 20,847 2 2ndwind Campfire Ranger
2ndwind Campfire Ranger 2 Joined: Mar 2004 Posts: 20,847	There are 3 sides to every story.. he said... she said...and the objective reality somewhere in the middle. You also might want to think about deleting the post... divorce proceedings get nasty and an investigator doesn't really even need to leave his office chair to follow all kinds of sent trails. YMMV Please don't feed the trolls!

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment 2ndwind #3113254 06/19/09
Joined: Apr 2009 Posts: 33,971 VA 2 SC byc Campfire 'Bwana
byc Campfire 'Bwana Joined: Apr 2009 Posts: 33,971 VA 2 SC	Originally Posted by 2ndwind You also might want to think about deleting the post... divorce proceedings get nasty and an investigator doesn't really even need to leave his office chair to follow all kinds of sent trails. YMMV true dat! Proud to be a true Sandlapper!! Go Nats!!!!

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment byc #3113274 06/19/09
Joined: Jan 2002 Posts: 12,192 Northern Colorado Tracks Campfire Outfitter
Tracks Campfire Outfitter Joined: Jan 2002 Posts: 12,192 Northern Colorado	I've done, been done to, watched a lot of it happen and didn't like it much from either side I dropped out of the rat race some time ago and at this point wonder why I ever cared. I'm a great believer in letting folks did their own holes and letting them dig themselves out

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment ADK4Rick #3113358 06/19/09
Joined: Feb 2001 Posts: 2,054 Two Washington counties beginn... Ward Campfire Regular
Ward Campfire Regular Joined: Feb 2001 Posts: 2,054 Two Washington counties beginn...	2x per year? Heck, I wouldn't know what to do with that much.

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Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment Ward #3113384 06/19/09
Joined: May 2009 Posts: 32 Santa Maria ca. M michaln Campfire Greenhorn
michaln Campfire Greenhorn M Joined: May 2009 Posts: 32 Santa Maria ca.	a thirsty man is gonna find a drink

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment michaln #3113399 06/19/09
Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930 HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter
HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930	"his Mrs. put him on a twice yearly ration of rollin in the hay about 5 years ago" I'da found my wings '5 years ago'.... Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog. -- Mark Twain Part of me lives with the wind in my face, while the other part is barely alive. --Mary Gauthier

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment HoundGirl #3113407 06/19/09
Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930 HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter
HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930	PS....and to answer the question directly, I'd die before I disrespected someone I loved....but then again, I'd rather be dead than live with someone I trusted and had disrespected me. I'm safe that way, though....cuz weeezy lovey to roll in the hay<grin>.... Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog. -- Mark Twain Part of me lives with the wind in my face, while the other part is barely alive. --Mary Gauthier

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment HoundGirl #3113471 06/19/09
Joined: Feb 2003 Posts: 15,551 MI -Blue Water Mac84 Campfire Ranger
Mac84 Campfire Ranger Joined: Feb 2003 Posts: 15,551 MI -Blue Water	Wifey says the same. "I Birn Quhil I Se" MacLeod of Lewis I Burn While I See Hold Fast MacLeod of Harris

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment 1akhunter #3113473 06/19/09
Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter
Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side	Originally Posted by 1akhunter dude what wears a derby nailed it. he already had permission Permission or not, a vow is a vow (or did he not promise to "keep himself only unto her" when they got married)? I can understand why he is feeling eaten up by guilt. However... what's done is done and if it's over and he's never going to do it again... I would say not to mention it to his wife. If she finds out, it will change her forever. It will change their marriage forever. It will impact their children forever. Now if he's contracted HIV or something, then he has to tell her. I don't like secrecy between spouses. But what does confessing this really solve? If it's simply to assuage his guilt, well, maybe guilt is the price he has to pay for his indiscretion. The hurt that she will feel if she finds out won't even come close to that. That's my take on the situation. YMMV Penny Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. --Hebrews 11:1

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Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment Barak's Womn #3113483 06/19/09
Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930 HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter
HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930	Originally Posted by Barak's Womn I don't like secrecy between spouses. But what does confessing this really solve? If it's simply to assuage his guilt, well, maybe guilt is the price he has to pay for his indiscretion. The hurt that she will feel if she finds out won't even come close to that. Penny Perhaps the next time she gives an ultimatum(sp?) she'll think twice....and, perhaps, the next time he doesn't have the nads to fly the coop after being given that ultimatum(sp?), he'll think twice. Without truth, there is nothing. Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog. -- Mark Twain Part of me lives with the wind in my face, while the other part is barely alive. --Mary Gauthier

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment Barak's Womn #3113486 06/19/09
Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 632 south carolina R rpowell Campfire Regular
rpowell Campfire Regular R Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 632 south carolina	i don't think she could feel much hurt. if she only gives it out twice a year, she is the one that is hurting the other. i don't think i know of any man that went into a marriage thinking ok, i get it twice a year???? i think divorce is the only way to go, and for the woman, she has some serious mental problems to work out.

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment HoundGirl #3113493 06/19/09
Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter
Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side	Originally Posted by HoundGirl Without truth, there is nothing. What would the truth solve in this case? I doubt it would strengthen the marriage, make the wife more inclined to have sex with her husband. I think that it would only hurt... not heal. I don't see what would be gained, but maybe I'm missing something... Penny Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. --Hebrews 11:1

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment rpowell #3113494 06/19/09
Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 632 south carolina R rpowell Campfire Regular
rpowell Campfire Regular R Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 632 south carolina	and, if anyone really wants to go there, she is the one that broke her marriage vows. a woman is supposed to submit to her husband. clearly she is not doing that.

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment rpowell #3113497 06/19/09
Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter
Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side	Originally Posted by rpowell i don't think she could feel much hurt. I truly believe that any spouse who learns that the other has cheated on him/her will be deeply hurt. Again, just my opinion... Penny Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. --Hebrews 11:1

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment rpowell #3113503 06/19/09
Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter
Barak's Womn Campfire Outfitter Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 10,414 at Barak's side	Originally Posted by rpowell and, if anyone really wants to go there, she is the one that broke her marriage vows. a woman is supposed to submit to her husband. clearly she is not doing that. Did they mention that in their vows? And even so, just because one person does wrong, does not make it right for the other. (Sorry... it's my mother speaking, and I can't help it! ) Penny Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. --Hebrews 11:1

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment rpowell #3113505 06/19/09
Joined: Oct 2005 Posts: 79,321 Likes: 2 B Bristoe Campfire Oracle
Bristoe Campfire Oracle B Joined: Oct 2005 Posts: 79,321 Likes: 2	Bottom line is,..the relationship is over once either of the participants shuts down on the other one. If the woman has no more investment in the marriage than to cut the man off and tell him to go get it elsewhere,...the marriage is a farce and needs to have the plug pulled on it.

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment Barak's Womn #3113506 06/19/09
Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930 HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter
HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930	Originally Posted by Barak's Womn Originally Posted by HoundGirl Without truth, there is nothing. What would the truth solve in this case? I doubt it would strengthen the marriage, make the wife more inclined to have sex with her husband. I think that it would only hurt... not heal. I don't see what would be gained, but maybe I'm missing something... Penny A reality check for both, perhaps(?). I see them both as chicken chits, too afraid to call it what it is. What does affording another 10 years to a marriage that is already dead do for either party? Just to save her feelings, or make him uncle his guilt? Nah, love is nothing without honesty. Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog. -- Mark Twain Part of me lives with the wind in my face, while the other part is barely alive. --Mary Gauthier

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment Barak's Womn #3113548 06/19/09
Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 632 south carolina R rpowell Campfire Regular
rpowell Campfire Regular R Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 632 south carolina	well, i hope they didn't get married in church then.

Re: NO JUDGEMENTS HERE:Infidelity,would ya,could ya,have ya and what were the consequences M or W please comment rpowell #3113561 06/19/09
Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930 HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter
HoundGirl Campfire Outfitter Joined: Jul 2005 Posts: 8,930	Originally Posted by rpowell and, if anyone really wants to go there, she is the one that broke her marriage vows. a woman is supposed to submit to her husband. clearly she is not doing that. HTFDIMT....Do tell me you are joshin' 'round and not serious, man. Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog. -- Mark Twain Part of me lives with the wind in my face, while the other part is barely alive. --Mary Gauthier

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