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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202 |
Anybody read this book. I took a look at a friends copy last night. It's fuggin hilarious.
"Son, let women figure out why they won�t screw you. Don�t do it for them."
"The worst thing you can be is a liar ... OK, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2"
"You thought it was hard? If kindergarten is busting your ass, I got some bad news for you about the rest of your life"
"I just want silence ... Jesus, it doesn�t mean I don�t like you. It just means right now I like silence more."
Deal with it.
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Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 13,760
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 13,760 |
Anybody read this book. I took a look at a friends copy last night. It's fuggin hilarious.
"Son, let women figure out why they won�t screw you. Don�t do it for them."
"The worst thing you can be is a liar ... OK, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2"
"You thought it was hard? If kindergarten is busting your ass, I got some bad news for you about the rest of your life"
"I just want silence ... Jesus, it doesn�t mean I don�t like you. It just means right now I like silence more."
This the guy with the dad that is an old retired physician?
War Damn Eagle!
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 19,505
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 19,505 |
"I just want silence ... Jesus, it doesn�t mean I don�t like you. It just means right now I like silence more."
Using this one will guarantee things are gonna' get loud.
4 out of 5 Great Lakes prefer Michigan. 
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202 |
Yup, that's the guy. His dad was a 'Nam vet that went into cancer research. Those quotes I posted weren't even the funniest ones, just the ones I found online easily.
Deal with it.
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,629
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,629 |
I've read his blog. The guy is a hoot, and right on the money. One of my favorites is, "Everybody's broke, so here's the rule for Christmas this year; if you still s**t your pants, you get a present. Otherwise tough s**t."
The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary. --H. L. Mencken www.oregonfirearms.org
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202 |
His Website"War hero? No. I was a doc in Vietnam. My job was to say "This is what happens when you screw a hooker, kid. Put this cream on your pecker."
Deal with it.
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202 |
�Yes I got him a gift. He had a kidney stone. You piss a rock through your pecker, you deserve more than just a pat on the f*cking back."
Deal with it.
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605 |
"I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or f*ck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that."
A serious student of the "Armchair Safari" always looking for Africa/Asia hunting books
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202 |
"I wanted to see Detroit win. I've been there. It's like God took a schit on a parking lot. They deserve some good news."
Deal with it.
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605 |
"A scar ain't 13 god damned stitches. I'll introduce you to men with REAL scars, then we'll all laugh at your f*cking 13 stitches together."
A serious student of the "Armchair Safari" always looking for Africa/Asia hunting books
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605 |
"I turn the kitchen faucet on and the shower burns you, yes, I get it...No, I'm not gonna stop, I'm just saying yes, I get that concept."
A serious student of the "Armchair Safari" always looking for Africa/Asia hunting books
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,605 |
bout half of these sound like my dad..............
A serious student of the "Armchair Safari" always looking for Africa/Asia hunting books
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 46,965
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 46,965 |
I'm buying two and giving one to my FIL. Let him buy my cheap azz BIL's their's. 
We may know the time Ben Carson lied, but does anyone know the time Hillary Clinton told the truth?
Immersing oneself in progressive lieberalism is no different than bathing in the sewage of Hell.
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202 |
"The dog don't like you planting stuff there. It's his backyard. If you're the only one who schits in something, you own it. Remember that."
Man, these things are bustin' me up.
Deal with it.
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Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 10,958 Likes: 6
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 10,958 Likes: 6 |
"A parent's only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed."
LOL - SO true.
They say everything happens for a reason.
For me that reason is usually because I've made some bad decisions that I need to pay for.
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202
Campfire Tracker
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OP
Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 3,202 |
"Don't listen to the p&ssy side of you when you make a decision. People gravitate towards being a p&ssy. Remove the p&ssy, son."
Last edited by AKBoater; 07/01/10.
Deal with it.
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 302
Campfire Member
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Campfire Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 302 |
�We�re banned from the dog park. Well, I guess it�s okay to hump, and it�s okay to bark, but both at the same time freaks people out."
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 895
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 895 |
[quote=bbassi] "A parent's only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed."I wonder where this leaves AlGORE's parents?
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 302
Campfire Member
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Campfire Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 302 |
You can watch the house while I'm gone. Just don't call me unless something's on fire, and don't screw in my bed."
My 4 year old keeps asking me whats so funny since I am laughing at all of these.
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 19,505
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 19,505 |
"Waking up when you got a baby, you feel like you drank a bottle of whiskey the night before, except the [bleep]'s in someone else's pants." I
4 out of 5 Great Lakes prefer Michigan.
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