Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Canada New Maps & Guidebook to Northern Ontario

Just a head's up for those of you who like to venture up North.

Canada's best-selling outdoor recreation series, Backroad Mapbooks tackles Northern Ontario with a new 176-page guide. Includes: Cochrane, Hearst, Manitoulin Island, Moosonee, North Bay, Sault Ste. Marie, Sudbury, Temagami, Timmins, Wawa and more.

**Maps now show Private & Crown Land**

Backroad Maps feature:
** Up to date backroad & logging roads
** Trail systems (Hiking, Biking, ATV & Snowmobile)
** Paddling routes with Put-ins & Portage info
** Lake, Stream & Fishing Hotspots
** Wilderness campsites
** Parks & Conservation Areas
** Topographic land features
** and much more

Pick up a copy of the Northeastern Ontario Backroad Mapbook at your local hunting, fishing or outdoor store.

Ah, but does it come with a list of stores where you can buy chocolates? Peppermint candy canes? Genuine imitation stuffed naughahyde mooses or bearses?

Are there directions to Santa's Castle? The only way to get there is directly through northern Ontario!

Most travel books include a pine scented car air freshener (free of charge), reminiscent of fall in northern Ontario. What about this book? I'm tired of purchasing map books only to find that they have black and white photos of Daleks, dead British monarchs or dirty pictures of military men on leave in Dresden during WWII.

I will NOT be tricked again! (Please note the bolded NOT in that last sentence. This indicates that I am overwrought.)
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Steve: What's coming up after the break, Walter?

Walter: Well Steve, we have 8mm movie pictures of the Cummings family trip to the Grand Canyon. Ooh, and how to make candy apples!

Steve: Wow! Sounds great!

That is handy but Wawa is really just the middle of the province.

Sorry but when you turn the official map over, the scale changes. While Cochrane and Wawa are not southern Ontario, they really are not north either other than in their position relative to Sarnia or point Peelie(spelled incorrectly on purpose).

I consider I moved south when I moved down to Thunder Bay District.

Randy

That's true! Wawa is less than halfway up, or, in the words of the Premier, whose name escapes me, somewhere between here, but past halfway down.

Here is part of whatever it was that he said that day, to whomever was listening...

"Funding to communities north of the southern border where northern Ontario meets the area south of it will be curtailed. No one in Queen's Park actually knows where it is that this money is supposed to be going to, or is going up to. Something like that, anyway. If northern Ontario truly was of any value to the province, it would be located farther south, somewhere close to Toronto!"

- excerpt from the Premier's soon to be released book - The Paint by Numbers Premier

Sadly, there's more...

"When I was ten, my parents sent me away to camp. They said that it would make a man of me. I think they just wanted to rid themselves of the responsibility.

I remember that awful day. They put me on a bus headed for Renfrew, but the change in elevation gave me a nose bleed, so the scoutmaster screamed at the bus driver to return to Ottawa. He said that I was a disgrace, and when we arrived back home, punched my father in the nose with his fist. Father said that if we had better health care in this country his brain wouldn't swell and he'd stop getting those terrible headaches.

I had an epiphany! I knew then that I would become premier and mess up the provincial infrastructure and health system to the max! But first, I had to race home to watch Batman with Adam West and Burt Ward. I just loved Burt Ward. There was a young man who really knew how to fill out a pair of tights!

- excerpt from the Premier's soon to be released book - The Paint by Numbers Premier

Anyway, where were we? Oh yes, Wawa. Tourists rarely get farther than there. They keep slipping on the goose pattookie and slide down the hill onto Hwy 17. Inevitably, either a tractor trailer or a bus full of Asian tourists hits them. Then, "Nee Nurrrr, Nee Nurrr" the ambulance and the police arrive with scrapers to clean up the mess.

(Tourist Tip No. 23 - Keep a bucket of cement tied to your belt to help prevent accidental slippage!)

This lucid moment was brought to you by the letter 3 and the number B.

Steve

What is your daily Prozak dosage?

Randy

How would he know? He hasn't taken it for a loooooooooonnnnggggg time.

There are so many people inside my head that are trying to get out. Prozak would only slow their exit.
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Tomorrow, how to cook eggs while they're still inside the chicken, and Marie will take us on a guided tour of the warehouse where they store menstrual cramps. But first, Man Talk with Jed Arnold. Jed will show us what happens with some male hunters that suffer from ED.

Extraction Dysfunction is a growing problem with more and more men. We'll examine what to do if you can't get it out.

That may explain those who shoot in high fence areas. I have come to realise with age that the real work begins when you try to get it out. So far I have been able to survive without machinery, but the day is coming when mechanical assists will be a part of my pleasure package.

You Steve must be a relative to Steve Smith.

Randy

He and I share the same outlook on life.

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Men that cast bullets have a feminine side. They won�t admit it, but many dream of Jell-O molds and Bundt cakes...
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The Lead! The Lead!
- the musket calls for musket balls

The lead! The lead!
The fumes swirl around in my head!
I'm gagging and choking!
From a pot that's still smoking!
And the moulds are all glowing bright red!

The lead! The lead!
I dream of it lying in bed!
All the casting and pouring!
Has ruined the flooring!
But my guns all have to be fed!

The lead! The lead!
I was casting the night we were wed!
Trying hard to make Postells
My bride became hostile!
But I heard not a word that she said!

The lead! The lead!
I make it for my brother Fred
His wife talked divorcing
So now he's outsourcing
It's kept him still shooting and wed!

The lead! The lead!
It'll burn a hot hole through your head!
So pay close attention
To what I've just mentioned
Or buy all your bullets instead!

- 2004

Steve

You have captured the essence of the caster. I still have probably 200 lbs of fluxed and ingots made of 20:1. When younger I used to cast between 5000 and 6000 a day with 6 gang molds for 38, 45, .458 and .312. A friend and I would spend three days in the spring and three days midsummer and between the two of us shoot 30,000 rounds a year. The only way to keep our wives happy was to let them shoot as much as they wanted without doing any reloading.

I enjoy your lighthearted writing which is so appropriate.

Randy

Thanks very much. There's always lots of time for serious gun talk, but between you and me, some folks take things too seriously here and some of the other boards. They should spend more time outside.

My day was different. I had to replace a bunch of attic insulation today. It was older stuff with virtually no insulating value. My place was built in 1949 and it appears the stuff I ripped out was at least that old.

Maybe they built the house around a pile of existing insulation.

At least I didn't find any newspaper between the walls!

Next year, I'd like to replace the windows.

Did a little of that the last couple years. Makes a difference.

The nice thing about old newspapers as insulation, they make interesting reading when you remove them. Not much work gets done, but interesting reading. Keith you remember that old house accross the tracks that Ted Allen lived in? There were papers lining the walls there from WW1.

The 10 point got shot by the neibour but the 14pt and some 8 and 6 point are still alive.

See you tomorrow.

reserve a big 6 or middlin' 8 for me and cut that kid off.

Couldn't agree more Randy. The book has 81-full page topo maps so there is no turning over of the map.

The book covers right up to Polar Bear Provincial Park on Hudson Bay and of course Moose Factory on James Bay. Map scale does change for North of Hearst & Kapuskasing but still much more detailed than anything else you'd find.

By the way, love how this map thread sparked a hilarious exchange between you and Steve!

Steve is a guy who has no end to his sense of humour. He is also extremely knowledgeable in the firearms area. The book sounds veery interesting. Where is it available?

I've had my feet on the ground, so to speak along a lot of the Severn River catchment area and Hudson Bay western shoreline. Not a lot of topography in the north west of the Bay. lots and lots of drainage streams though.

Randy

I just like to think of myself as someone who has been knocked senseless a lot.

I think a lot in order to make up for all the time that I've been unconscious. First, smoke pours out of my ears, then my skull heats up and my hair catches fire. I pass out and the cycle repeats.

Quit bragging about having hair.

Randy the follically berift.