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COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America.

ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It's 7.8%.

COSTELLO: That many people are out of work?

ABBOTT: No, that's 14.7%.

COSTELLO: You just said 7.8%.

ABBOTT: 7.8% Unemployed.

COSTELLO: Right 7.8% out of work.

ABBOTT: No, that's 14.7%.

COSTELLO: Okay, so it's 14.7% unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, that's 7.8%.

COSTELLO: WAIT A MINUTE. Is it 7.8% or14.7%?

ABBOTT: 7.8% are unemployed. 14.7% are out of work.

COSTELLO: IF you are out of work you are unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, Obama said you can't count the "Out of Work" as the
unemployed. You have to look for work to be unemployed.

COSTELLO: BUT THEY ARE OUT OF WORK!!!

ABBOTT: No, you miss his point.

COSTELLO: What point?

ABBOTT: Someone who doesn't look for work can't be counted with those
who look for work. It wouldn't be fair.

COSTELLO: To whom?

ABBOTT: The unemployed.

COSTELLO: But they are ALL out of work.

ABBOTT: No, the unemployed are actively looking for work. Those who are
out of work gave up looking and if you give up, you are no longer in the
ranks of the unemployed.

COSTELLO: So if you're off the unemployment roles that would count as
less unemployment?

ABBOTT: Unemployment would go down. Absolutely!

COSTELLO: The unemployment just goes down because you don't look for
work?

ABBOTT: Absolutely it goes down. That's how Obama gets it to 7.8%.
Otherwise it would be 14.7%. He doesn't want you to read about 14.7%
unemployment.

COSTELLO: That would be tough on his reelection.

ABBOTT: Absolutely.

COSTELLO: Wait, I got a question for you. That means there are two ways
to bring down the unemployment number?

ABBOTT: Two ways is correct.

COSTELLO: Unemployment can go down if someone gets a job?

ABBOTT: Correct.

COSTELLO: And unemployment can also go down if you stop looking for a
job?

ABBOTT: Bingo.

COSTELLO: So there are two ways to bring unemployment down, and the
easier of the two is to have Obama's supporters stop looking for work.

ABBOTT: Now you're thinking like the Obama Economy Czar.

COSTELLO: I don't even know what the hell I just said!

ABBOTT: Now you're thinking like Obama.

?

That is good, it would be a lot funnier if it were not true.

I'm confuzigated. Somebody told me that Bill Clinton was the first black president, and now they sat that Obama, a half white, half black mulatto from Kenya is our first black president.

But at least I now understand the difference between being out of work and unemployed - I think. Now can someone explain the difference between lies, damn lies, and horseshit?

Not a lot, they all come from an orifice that looks like a politicians open mouth.