He's 80 and mobility getting tougher.
Asked me which guns I wanted, told me to come and get em now.

I told him he's got 5 to 10 more yrs in him and they're his, do as he wishes with em.

Just feels wrong to go over and take my dad's stuff.
Yrs ago I mentioned a couple (when asked) that he could put in the will.

Hate this kinda crap.

He had an old bud that was in bad shape, wanted me and pops to take all his guns (less than a dozen) as his daughter and son in law were jerks.
We didn't.
The old man died, the jerk son in law flipped em for cheap.

I then understood how it wasn't about the guns, but the guns and having good folks use them.
The gift more than the hardware.

Kind of a slice of immortality.

Pops has good insurance, and is OK for a while.
Figure things need to get much closer to the end before I accept any.

I could buy a couple, at market value, if he puts them up. I'd do that early.
But then he could sell em and that wouldn't bother me either.

Its his stuff.

You should accept them, graciously.

I am going to sound like an ass you will have to forgive me. Suck it up princess your dad is still ahead of you.

I went through a version of that. My dad had Alzheimer's, and was way past shooting or loading. My step-mother called my brothers and I and said it was time to clean out the gun room. My dad was standing there as we sorted through and packed up all his shooting and reloading stuff. He was really stressed, and we kept having to distract and re-direct him away from the room. It was a hard day A traumatic day for all of us. Decades of memories in that room. Some of my earliest memories. I still use his stuff with reverence. I still thank him each time I use something that was his. I still tear up just typing this.

I hope you can find a way to make it an honorable exchange for both you and your dad. I feel for you.

Before my Dad died He gave me all his guns. I just kept them and will give out to family members when they are ready. I could care less about monetary value . Want to pass along his memory.


Just accept them and try and to keep in the family.

He wants YOU to have them.

I agree. Wholeheartedly. It would give him tremendous joy.

Your Dad won't get any joy from you having them after he's dead. Accepting a gift graciously is a social skill much lacking these days.

I want to KNOW that mine made it into the hands that I want to have them...................

maybe your dad does too!!!

He just might want the enjoyment of knowing you are using them. I've given a few of mine away just to know that they are being used. Some have and some haven't, but that is ok too. I've got grandchildren that will get them before too long.

Well I am 69 years old and have been trying to get my sons and grandson to come and get some of the guns I have now so they can use them now rather than later. My son said the same thing as you, that I should keep them because they were mine and I still had some time to use them, or I should sell them. I don't need the money.

I don't hunt like I use to and I cannot possibly make good use of all to these I have. I purchased many of these guns with them in mind when I bought them, and them getting use of them now makes me happy. I loaded up a dozen or so and took them to him. They are actually doing me a favor by allowing me to get down to a manageable amount of rifles and a couple of shotguns, it give me a little room in my safe for some fly rods.

Just maybe your father is like me and he truly wants you to have his guns.

100% agree...

Every exchange has a cost/responsibly.

Making sure your pops has respect and dignity is a fair exchange in his eyes... I would bet on every time.

Exactly...

Pops peace of mind should never be discounted.

Yep, my Pops is 84 and handed over his Winchesters when he was 70 or so....just the cycle of life.

Several years ago, Dad stepped into my house with his old Rem 760 in '06 with the 3-9 Bushnell Scopecheif and I was honored to take custody of it for him.

Hes a grumpy old bastid LOL
With cooler temps he should get out more to the range.
Should help his disposition.

As long as he still sends lead down range I figure he should keep all his stuff (or sell whatever he wants to).
If he sells it all tomorrow, that's cool.

My concern is his possible future medical expenses, and IMHO his stuff could be sold for that (if need be).

Sorry for your loss. Glad you have stuff to stay connected

My dad got old on me

But he's still going, just slower and a little wobbly.
And he still shoots.

Not avoiding the issue, just don't think it time yet (since still shooting).
I figure he's got 2-5 more yrs before the exchange.
and maybe another 5 past that.

But really my focus is not having one of his grandkids beat him to the grave.

She does like his Anschutz Exemplar LOL

I think that it will make him feel better if you thank him and show your appreciation for him by taking him hunting and fishing on every occasion he wants. Ask him every other week from now until he goes into eternity. I'd let him know that they are his and always will be.....you will keep them safe for him and the wrong people won't steal them.

Just my thoughts looking back.

It has zero to do with monetary value. I gave a rifle and a pistol to a cousin (when it was still legal to do so). It’s a good feeling. Schit doesn’t matter.

I agree. Your father has made the decision on his own, in accordance with how he realizes that things are not the way they were and he isn't able, at 80, to do those things he enjoyed when younger. He has decided it is time to give them to you, so you can use and enjoy them ... and at the same time, remember your good times with him.

I am older than your father and can not get out and do the things I enjoyed when I was younger and could still get around well. I have an idea I know how your father feels.

As said above, "Accept them graciously," and enjoy them, and the memories.

Just my opinion.

L.W.

Exactly as he wishes.. or someone will.

I don't follow your logic. You're denying him the pleasure of giving you what he wants when he wants to see you get some good out of it, and if cash needs to be raised later you could sell them and use the money for him.

My bud and I tried to take him hunting and fishing yrs ago.

Stubborn and cranky are understatements

Pops does what pops wants to do, always has.
Hes OK, just way different. That too an understatement.

It has to be his idea or it aint happening.

Considering the cost of the medical $ system, those won't begin to cover the costs. Typically, the hospitals are rigged to syphon as much gas out of that tank as possible.

My health care system is the ounce of healthy prevention. The day that my dad got wobbly was a death sentence. I made the mistake of taking him in for testing. Thought it was the right thing to do. How wrong I was. He didn't die from the issue of wobbly....that was the meds.... I should have carefully took him off the Rx according to my Dr., hydrated, etc. per a healthy protocol that my current Physician recommends.

I’m young but I think about this.. My daughter shoots she enjoys doing things with me. I hope she takes all my rifles when the time comes..

My grandpa gave me a marlin auto 22 when I was about 8. Made me feel 10 feet tall. Different situation than yours, but if you and your dad are on good terms, I'd take the gift, enjoy it, and tell him what you do with it.

As long as he is capable of making his own decisions on health care, then IMHO he can make his decisions on financial.
He isn't giving me stuff, he's asking what stuff I want.

I won't take anything.

Now if he came over with that old 1100 T in the car and said I better grab it, I would.
But then I'd sneak some cash back into his mug at his place.

Yes, my youngest, the one w health issues, likes to shoot.
Id give her all my stuff. Which isn't much, and most she would never use.
She can't have kids..........so not like she'd save em for a grandson.
But I'd still give her what I have. Because she's kinda mechanical and more like me.

My dad? Has lots of stuff. Just sayin.

If your dad still shoots, why not just let him come and get what he wants to shoot from you, when he wants to go.

If I could give away a few of mine right now (they fell overboard though) I might, just in case anything happens then my non-gun person wife would have fewer worries and my family would not have to come for as many (but they still fell overboard).

I'm on the side of "honor thy father and mother" and do what pops wants you to do.

Ever consider he may have an issue he's not telling you about? Stubborn old men are known for that kind of stuff.

He wanted you to have them.

It means a great deal to him knowing that they are safe.

My Grandfather told me and my Dad what he wanted us to with the stuff in his house.

It took about a week to get it all done and when he was told it was done he died the next day.

He did tell us that he was glad it was done.

With a sick kid and an aging father, I'm kinda stuck in the middle on this living/dying thing.
Its uncomfortable.

Just feels (rightly or wrongly) that accepting a few of his guns, isn't becoming a custodian.
It isn't a changing of the guard.

It makes me feel like the grim reaper.

That's good that you tried.
You know your Pops and what he likes to do. Any activities together will be worth more than gold some day. I hope that you eventually celebrate his 100th birthday and he's still sharp.

I'm not understanding why you can't accept a gift from your father. It may help you to look at this. Swap roles, maybe. See yourself as the old man attempting to do for your son what your dad is doing for you. Would you like cash back from him, or would it cheapen the gift, and a lot? I don't know about you, and I don't know about your dad, but for me and for my dad, guns aren't just another consumer good. They represent something deeper than just what can be bought or sold with money.

I feel qualified to add my 2 cents. I am in your Dad's position, and have begun the process of gifting the guns to my son and grandsons. It feels GOOD, and it makes me happy.

My father was a bit different! He told me he was selling all his guns to a construction buddy in VT. I told hm if he was selling tham he was going to sell them to me!! I had to pay what he was offered from the VT guy.

Take them before the vultures arrive. Things have a way of growing legs after love ones leave.

Just prayed for you and your family.
PM anytime.

My dad is 93 and we still take him hunting and fishing. It's hard because he depends on a walker to get around, but it's well worth it to both of us. He usually won't shoot anything but enjoys sitting in pops road stand.

He's giving you your choice, and I don't believe choosing nothing is an option that will make him feel good.

Might upset him if you don’t take them now. It could be a load off of him. After him seeing what happened to his friend’s firearms.


My grandfather lived another 7,8 years after he doled out chunks of his estate. He wasn’t particularly pleased with what my mother did with with $100Large but that’s another story.

A couple of years ago, while at my Dad's place, my Dad, who is also 80, asked me to come into his gun room (the basement). He had his pre-64 Win. Model 70 in 264 Win Mag sitting on his bench and asked me if I wanted it? I said, of course I want it, but I don't want to take it from you, you can still use it. Now, you have to understand that this rifle was my Dad's pride and joy. He'd taken many animals with that rifle and I knew it was one of his favorites. He never had even let me shoot it in the past. But he told me that he had plenty of other rifles to use if he wanted to and that he didn't think he would be using this rifle any more and wanted me to have it to use. I started to say something, hesitating, and he told me that I better take it now before he changed his mind. I swallowed my objections and took the rifle. He subsequently gave me a box with all of his brass, bullets, and loading dies for the rifle. And then I started shooting it, handloading for it, and then took it on an Antelope hunt where he accompanied me and my son. I believe it made him happy to see me hunting with it. Dad is still around and doing well, but doesn't hunt much anymore, or shoot much. He told me not to tell my siblings that he had given it to me, and I didn't. But I subsequently found out from my brother that my Dad had given him an -06 of his. So I figured he was getting rid of a few before he kicked the bucket. And, I figured it was his decision to make

I say take the rifle or rifles, if offered, and give him some peace of mind that you'll appreciate them as much as he has. It's probably not about the money to him.

Exactamundo. I have been farming mine out for the last couple years to the people I want to have them...

Ive called folks, I’m 68, and told them a gun or knife they are getting.

People in my family live to at least their early 90s.

Folks wonder if I’m alright.........then we talk and they understand

It will ease your dads mind knowing things will go as he wants.

Ease his mind. It is important to him.

I’ve given guns that aren’t built yet.

Go get em .
He wants you to have them and know they are in your care.

We all have heard the stories, I'm sure he has also.
He wants a peice of mind passing em on to you.
Let him have that peice of mind while he is still alive.
He is reaching out to you to have them now.
Do it so it aint an unspoken issue for either of you. Dont let it become uncovered ground.

No other way to put it.

Consider it an honor with diginity he is wanting to accomplish.

I gave away a safe full of guns to a family member a while ago. They had accumulated and I was tired of maintaining them.

I could have sold them but didn't need the aggravation, so I just gave them away.

Now I'm out buying some more that are more closely aligned to my interests today.

I’m in my mid 60s and have more guns than I need. A couple were handed down from my parents and there’s nothing that would please me more than seeing my kids take them now and take their kids out shooting with them.

Actually I’ve already told them that there’s some of them in ready to hand down now but just waiting for one of them to get a gun safe set up first.

I’d say take them. Also may consider taking him out shooting with some of them. My mom is 89 and we still take her out once a year to shoot the S&W 32 pistol my dad gave her in the 40s

You probably don't need another fella saying the same thing, but IMO you should take them all and thank him. Then clean and oil the entire lot and offer to take him shooting.
His guns, his choice.. and he chose you.

I went through this in the last year with my dad. It was tough.

My dad is 86.
He wants them handed out now. He enjoys being able to give them away. I cant take that from him.

Also less [bleep] for us and mom to go through when it's time.

Use them and tell him about it.

+1

I’ll echo what others have said. That he probably wants for you to have them and hear about you enjoying them while he’s still living. You should go get the guns tell him how loved he is and how much you appreciate the guns.

My father did something similar to that. Then ,later on he changed his mind about how he wanted his guns handled. I was supposed to get all of them, and there's probably close to 50 or more guns. My two natural brothers can't have them due to previous arrests/convictions and my two step-brothers are just idiots.

Well, one day my father and I were out at the range and he said he has changed his mind about the guns and wants me to sell them for him when he's gone and give my step mother the money. He said I could come over and pick 5 guns that I could have when he was gone and sell the rest.

It sucked, but I finally went over and made my choices.

Id take a few of them, it will make him Happy, he may know something that you dont health wise!

Have no sons and will not have grandchildren ( due to health risks ).

Am the last.

Sis has kids, is well off. Lives several states away. Her kids met him twice? No boys.

About 20 yrs ago it was discussed, what would i like when he is gone. He has the list.

AFAIC ill get em whenever that time comes.
Its not like hes preoccupied with death all of a sudden.

It isnt a new subject.

He blabs about it once a week now..... instead of once every two weeks like he has the last 10 yrs.

Or once a month like he did the 10 yrs before that.

Foreigners are strange LOL

My pops is on a kick where about once a month he gives me and my daughter 2 or 3 Morgan dollars and a couple of walking liberty halves.


Maybe he’ll bring his Sig down one day 😃

My dad is Sig crazy.
I had to show him how to run the Lula loader for his 1911.

He was trying it backwards lol

Here is your answer.

He has not offered specific items to me, has asked that I pick some from a decent sized catalog.

I did that yrs ago.

He has the list, and I can wait. He can throw away the list too. Doesnt matter to me.
We are very different people.

I think he might be a bit pissed that I dont shoot or do all the stuff I used to.

Hell i just dumped some of my own stuff because i wasnt using it or it pissed me off.



Similar deal, no stepmom though.
Sis is very well off and is not close to pops.

Watch the old fart be a total deke and say sell it all in the will and donate the $ to BLM

LOL

Hell theres 60 reloading presses in rhe garage.
And he wants to keep all of those LMFAO

The museum nobody would visit.

I'd say, accept the gifts with the understanding he can use any at any time he likes?

Ha!, I'm 76, and still buying.

I'm going through a similar thing with my Dad. My Mom passed a year and a half ago and he's living alone for the first time in his life - it's tough watching him try to adjust. He's obviously thinking quite a bit about the end and is asking my siblings and I similar questions about what we want. He's giving us some of it now and hanging on to other things for the time being. He gave me all of his archery stuff a couple years ago and is hanging on to his guns for now.

Heart warming story. I will be offering my kids my "stuff" from the "room" in the not too distant future so this also brought a tear to my eyes. God bless.

#1,
I would have reacted just like you. And have, with Mom.

#2,
Dad wants you to have them. And like you said, "They are his to do with as he wants. "
So, accept what he wants.

#3
Dad may well be aware of the med expense issue. Maybe he feels that if you have
them now, they are yours. And not susceptible to seizure for his debt.

Have another conversation.

"Dad, I bought a safe.
It's in the basement, just for the guns you are giving me.
I will gladly accept them, and store them there.
If at anytime you want or need one of them, we know where they are,
And I still consider them yours. On one of the worst days of my life,
They will become mine." (You might not be able to look at each other)

The circumstances are a bit different, but I have Dads whole collection.
He and I are the only ones that have that combination. (Mine is locked in my safe
I never, ever, get in his safe. Unless he asks me to drop off a certain gun if I'm coming by)
He feels that I have them.
I consider them his. And always will!
Heck, a couple were his dad's!

You don't own guns, you're just their caretaker for a while.

I'd do it differently. Take them out one at a time for a shoot together. Make a little routine out of it, have him tell the story of this one or that one.

I'll be giving rifles away before I croak because I want them to have good homes, and it's also a nice way to be remembered. Or maybe I'll just sell them for a favorable price.

Be thankful you have such a good father, take the guns now while the getting is good for both of you, he will be happy you have them. I am now 80 years old, my son passed away a while back so I have absolutely nobody to leave them to. Have been selling them off to folks who want them bad enough to pay a fair price, proceeds probably to the local gun club.

He is doing what nhe wishes with them and he wants to SEE you enjoy them before he goes.