Consistent with the second part of the video that g5m linked above, I assume that the XDM will recoil, at least, a bit more than the G40—based on my experience with my XDs and Glocks in other calibers.
I have a number of 10mms, and the G40 produces the mildest recoil in my hands.
I was looking at Glock 20,40 and Springfield XDM. I went to a very very well stocked gun store yesterday and handled a Dan Wesson Bruin. WOW
If I was being attacked by a Chinese rifle platoon, that G40 would be my pick. But the DW Bruin is my pick for hunting, target shooting, and just holding, looking at, and fondling.
In case it helps, below are some of my 10mm chrono results for a variety of loads and guns.