Consistent with the second part of the video that g5m linked above, I assume that the XDM will recoil, at least, a bit more than the G40—based on my experience with my XDs and Glocks in other calibers.
I have a number of 10mms, and the G40 produces the mildest recoil in my hands.
I was looking at Glock 20,40 and Springfield XDM. I went to a very very well stocked gun store yesterday and handled a Dan Wesson Bruin. WOW
If I was being attacked by a Chinese rifle platoon, that G40 would be my pick. But the DW Bruin is my pick for hunting, target shooting, and just holding, looking at, and fondling.