Me, as a little kid: what's that you've got?
My grandad: kit fur to make kitten britches.
My grandad often said "if you can't eat it or f*** it, you sh*t on it or break it. Petcoon!"
Other things he said:
Sh*t fire to save matches!
You got a beer income and a champagne appetite.
Ain't got sense enough to pour piss out of a boot.
Sorry shi*ass!
Wish I'd written it all down. Been gone since '93.