Sex ain't a big deal. I can understand anyone having a bit too much wine and sleeping with the bellboy or the maid (depending on which spouse we are talking about).
Intimacy on the other head is the one I can't get past. Sex doesn't equal intimacy. Intimacy that lovers share, not a quick [bleep].
Of course the trust thing is an issue, but if a gal slipped up once after too much Vino and told me I could work through it.
I hear you and know of many who have worked through infidelity. More power to them. Might be able to work through such myself considering the past together. But as you say, intimacy is another thing than sex. If things have progressed to a over night get away deceptively plotted things have moved beyond a quick [bleep]/moment of weakness. Time to stop quick and throw the other in the dirt. I'd let their reaction to such dictate whether reconciliation is a option. Not saying to lose your poise. Be a rock, show stability to the kids, and plot ahead in a new direction without looking back. Love your line about women always needing a branch to hang onto before letting go of the one in hand. Truth is most men are that way as well. If you can get by that most find it unsettling which is a good thing,IMO,.
