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Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 10,259 Likes: 7
Campfire Outfitter
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OP
Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 10,259 Likes: 7 |
I been running all over hell's half acre.
She's busier than a cat covering crap on a marble floor.
I'm as busy as a one-legged cat in a sandbox.
Busier than a moth in a mitten!
P.
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,229
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,229 |
"You done let your alligator mouth out talk your jaybird ass".
This one is self explanatory I think. Usually spoken just before somebody gets there ass "Whooped like a redheaded stepchild."
*Master of random precision*
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 19,109 Likes: 5
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 19,109 Likes: 5 |
That truck couldn't pull a sick whore off a pi$$ pot
If God wanted you to walk and carry things on your back, He would not have invented stirrups and pack saddles
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Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 11,328 Likes: 9
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 11,328 Likes: 9 |
"Hotter than a $2.00 pistol"
"Mean as a rattle snake"
Southwest Pa. entry ; Mary Dam, Suzy Dam, and the whole Damn family.
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 79,321 Likes: 2
Campfire Oracle
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Campfire Oracle
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 79,321 Likes: 2 |
"Tripped comin' down the stairs and I'm all stove up this mornin'"
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 3,362
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 3,362 |
Just stood there bigger'n Dallas.
"Who licked the red off your candy?"
Keep a tight slack in that rope.
A "skosh" of whatever.
For lagniappe.
Larrupin'! (What's that? It's so good, don't get any on your forehead 'cause your tongue will bash yer brains in trying to get the last bit.)
SO GOOD YOU'LL SLAP YO MAMMA (FOR MORE).
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Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 2,693 Likes: 1
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 2,693 Likes: 1 |
He's more nervous than a cat in a room full of rockin' chairs.
The biggest problem our country has is not systemic racism, it's systemic stupidity.
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Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 19,262 Likes: 2
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 19,262 Likes: 2 |
There was an older lady who worked for me on the farm. I was always picking on her, and her favorite saying was..."you lie like a Yankee". I asked her one day how come she knew Yankees lied, and she laughed and said it was just a saying her grandma used to have. She went on to say that she didn't even know any Yankees.....to which I told her that she hadn't missed out on anything.
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 19,131 Likes: 4
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 19,131 Likes: 4 |
That truck couldn't pull a sick whore off a pi$$ pot That truck would not pull a greased string out of a cats ass. miles
Look out for number 1, don't step in number 2.
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Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 23,319
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 23,319 |
"Lord willing and the Creek don't rise." Refers to the uprising of the Creek indian nation, not a stream of water.
"All that the South has ever desired was that the Union, as established by our forefathers, should be preserved, and that the government, as originally organized, should be administered in purity and truth." – Robert E. Lee
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Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 79
Campfire Greenhorn
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Campfire Greenhorn
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 79 |
A glass eye in a pigs azz could see that wouldn't work
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 9,408 Likes: 2
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 9,408 Likes: 2 |
Colder than a tin toilet in an igloo
Axle deep to a ferris wheel
Couldn't knock a sick nun off the crapper
mike r
Last edited by lvmiker; 12/14/16.
Don't wish it were easier
Wish you were better
Stab them in the taint, you can't put a tourniquet on that.
Craig Douglas ECQC
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 9,423 Likes: 1
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 9,423 Likes: 1 |
"dumber n a sack of hammers"
"nervous as a long tail cat in a room full or rockers"
"madder than a wet hen"
"ugly as a mud fence"
"busy as a whore on nickel night"
Excerpt from a real conversation had with my two Northern suitemates during my first week of college many years ago:
Me: "Are y'all fixing to head out?"
Them: "What?"
Me: "Are y'all fixing to head out (louder)"
Them: "What?"
Me "Are you guys preparing to depart?"
Them: laughing
Always remember that you are unique, just like everyone else.
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Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 7,437
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 7,437 |
Busier that a one-armed paper hanger.
μολὼν λαβέ
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 9,408 Likes: 2
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 9,408 Likes: 2 |
My favorite, Uglier than a leper colony whore.
mike r
Don't wish it were easier
Wish you were better
Stab them in the taint, you can't put a tourniquet on that.
Craig Douglas ECQC
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 96,121 Likes: 1
Campfire Oracle
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Campfire Oracle
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 96,121 Likes: 1 |
"Drunker than Cooter Brown"
"He doesn't know if he should wind his ass or scratch his watch"
"Happy as a dead pig in the sunshine"
"Dear Lord, save me from Your followers"
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 69,749 Likes: 36
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 69,749 Likes: 36 |
Well, that went over like a turd in the milk bucket!
Molɔ̀ːn Labé Skýla!
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 23,453
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 23,453 |
Ain't sure we have enough bandwidth on this site to list all the Southern sland and sayin's.
America needs to understand that our troops are not 'disposable'. Each represents a family; Fathers, Mothers, Sons, Daughters, Cousins, Uncles, Aunts... Our Citizens are our most valuable treasure; we waste far too many.
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 917
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 917 |
Why wipe your a$$ if you're just going to schit again later.
George
Dad always said, "Nadie Nacio Ensenado" (No One Was Born Taught)
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Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 7,437
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 7,437 |
Colder that a well diggers nose.
μολὼν λαβέ
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Forums81
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Jul 7th, 2023
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