Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Funeral Planning?

Have your funeral planed? I went to a cousin's yesterday. Along with wanting a couple of hymns I have in mind, I think I'll ask for fireworks set off at the cemetery last thing.

I donate my body for sniper practice.

I'm planning on skipping mine. Maybe a memorial service, but the tradition of human taxidermy has about run its course IMO.

"Don't he look natural" is Biggest Lie #4, 5 at the least. He looks like schitt.

Always told my sons I wanted them to sneak my ashes up to Gettysburg and shoot them out of one of the brass cannons, but that's probably some kind of crime of Mass Destruction now.

I'd be fine with maybe a pine squirrel, a couple ravens, a coyote, and an eagle in attendance.

2 for me, The Old Rugged Cross, and In the Garden

There you go men, you have the planning done.

Shoe box full of old photos on the foyer table and a gift card for a 20 piece bucket of KFC.

you do have a foyer table, don’t you?

wabigoon;
Top of the morning to you sir, I hope this finds you and your fine family well and warm on the second Saturday of 2020.

Since we've been dealing with the passing of my own mother in the past year and we're not sure how much longer my much loved mother in law will be with us, it's been a much discussed topic in our immediate family.

Along with that of course, we've done a fair bit of estate planning which is, in my opinion the most unselfish thing we can do for the folks who'll be in charge of cleaning up what we've accumulated. I'll add a plea here for all the gentle readers to have a current and valid will done as soon as possible and thanks in advance from all of us who've been executors.

Personally, I've told the family that my wish is for cremation and they can scatter my remains on whatever decent mulie and whitetail habitat they can access when the time comes. I figure that since I've spent a full lifetime eating venison grown on the mountain behind the house, the least I can do is fertilize some feed for them when I pass.

With regards to a service wabigoon, I've left it up to them to decide what they'd like to do as I'm of the belief that funeral services are for the living left behind, if that makes sense?

All the best to you folks in 2020 and do stay warm as this next Arctic front moves southward.

Dwayne

Always polite, and to the point Dwayne. You are the gemstone on the crown on the 'fire.

The worst used car salesman is still better than any funeral director.

Immediate cremation.

Kids are to invite those on a short list of people I would like to attend a dinner. For the first hour the guests have to curb their tongues, after that hour they can just relax, kick back, and let the mellow flow.

Letters or short notes will be left from me to each guest.

There is a reason specific to each and every person to be asked to attend.

Music of many genres will be played, EXCEPT for CRAP, RAP, AND JIGGER !

Lynn

I would like the first song to be "Copperhead Road" sung by Steve Earle. Someone on here posted it one time and the damn song has stayed with me. I have several other requests I have told the kids, and they are cool with it.

I just want my old dogs to dig the hole this time and bury me.

Mark Twain's Rules for Funeral Etiquette

Do not criticize the person in whose honor the entertainment is given.

Make no remarks about his equipment. If the handles are plated, it is best to seem to not observe it.

If the odor of the flowers is too oppressive for your comfort, remember that they were not brought there for you, and that the person for whom they were brought suffers no inconvenience from their presence.

Listen, with as intense an expression of attention as you can command, to the official statement of the character and history of the person in whose honor the entertainment is given; and if these statistics should seem to fail to tally with the facts, in places, do not nudge your neighbor, or press your foot upon his toes, or manifest, by any other sign, your awareness that taffy is being distributed.

If the official hopes expressed concerning the person in whose honor the entertainment is given are known by you to be oversized, let it pass -- do not interrupt.

At the moving passages, be moved -- but only according to the degree of your intimacy with the parties giving the entertainment, or with the party in whose honor the entertainment is given. Where a blood relation sobs, an intimate friend should choke up, a distant acquaintance should sigh, a stranger should merely fumble sympathetically with his handkerchief. Where the occasion is military, the emotions should be graded according to military rank, the highest officer present taking precedence in emotional violence, and the rest modifying their feelings according to their position in the service.

Do not bring your dog.

No, something else I hire smart folk to do, they can put me in a new spittoon for all I care, have a nice meal, then have Wife bring my smoked ass home and put up on the fireplace mantel.

Damn good advice !

Lynn

I had originally asked to be cremated in my fire-proof flight suit, just as a final irritant to all involved. But I relented.

I did write a Just In Case letter and have a link to it on my computer desktop. It contains a few tender remarks of goodbye, suggestions on who to help value and sell my guns, instructions on how to open the safe, where my important documents are, and the suggestion that the golf course may be a nice place to deposit my ashes. May the damn geese there choke on them!

No one else likes fireworks?

lol. I knew of a guy in Louisiana who wanted to be cremated and have his ashes mixed into shotgun shells, to be fired at wood ducks coming in to roost. does that count?

You’ll never hear more lies than at a funeral.

My wife’s grandaddy’s funeral....I thought the preacher got his notes mixed up with someone else.

I average about 5 funerals a year. Unbelievable some of the horseshít I hear about these people.

For a C-Note, the parlor pastor can make you out to be a saint.

Miss Lynn Good to see you out and about . Happy New Year. Cheers NC