Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Marital Advice... Retrospect.

Been married to this one for 35+ years and we still aggravate the heck out of each other sometimes. I tell my kids not to get married and so far they're listening. Hopefully that'll change, misery loves company and a grand kid or two would be nice.

Beta males can't cope w/ a strong woman, or the CF.


mike r

RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE

1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.

2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.

3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.

5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.

7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, "In the lake."

8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.

9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" The driver said, "No, jump in!".

10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.

11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was 'Always'.

12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.

13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!".

Have not had any of those issues.


Okay I can talk now...she's gone!



I swear to god that should I win lotto I am going to put a hit on that fucking cunt responsible for that damned spellcheck.


There...fixed the cunt of a thing.

Always answer the question directly. For example:
Q: “Is there any girls I need to know about?”
A: “No, none that you need to know about.”

A complementary blend of strengths and weaknesses is a beautiful thing.

Marry a good woman,you'll have a good marriage.Marry a nutty bitch...
it' a living hell .Belive me ,i learned the hard way.

Marital advice?

When I was a teenager my father walked into my bedroom while I was masturbating.
We were both surprised, but my Father just said, "Son - save that for when you get married."
- And he left the room.

Several years later, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She accepted, and on our Wedding Night,
I called my father and said - "Dad? I'm married now, and I have a question I need to ask you -

"What am I supposed to do with all them barrels?"

I like my wife.

Of course you do. You don't live in Texas either.

I do too, she is a 🍑 peach.

Marriage?

Beat off and buy rifles

Yes, it is.

I'll leave this here:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1492777862/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o04_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Government steals wives and then enslaves husbands with child support.

Then they steal the kids to indoctrination camps/free daycares aka public school.

The answer is freedom to jerk a knot in the tail of anyone foolish enough vto abuse your daughter or sister. Government just can't handle that.

I used to live in a community property state and now I live in an “equitable division” state. The community property regime is substantially better than one that lets the judge make it all up on the back end. Community property laws specify in advance what constitutes community and separate property. Separate property includes property owned before the marriage, property donated specifically to one spouse during the marriage (such as manual gifts and inheritances). There also is some community property that can be managed by one spouse, such as certain business interests, even if the other spouse has an ownership interest. There may some reimbursement rights if community property is used to enhance separate property or vice versa. (The same concepts generally apply to debts.) But, the parties to a marriage know exactly on the front end how property is going to be divided and debts will be allocated if there is a split. If people cannot understand on the front end that property acquired during the marriage, with some exceptions, will be community property and equally divided, they really should consider whether they want to get married, and perhaps discuss the division of labor, or they can vary any of that with a pre-nup prior to getting married.

As for no fault divorce, you may be right if it results in people not attempting to work things out, but I submit that it is the way it should be. A person should not be forced to stay in a marriage that s/he does not want to be in. If people do not even attempt to resolve their differences, they were a wrong fit from the beginning.

Child support is the responsibility of both parents. The manner in which property is divided and the earning potential of each parent (whether working or not) should have an impact on that.