Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Top douchey names yelled across a crowded dove field

Todd

Two black friends I grew up with would go dove hunting with me when we were kids. They loved to come over and eat supper with us afterwards.

I’d always tell them Mom was fixing fried chicken and watermelons. 🤠

you no shootin' bastard is a common phrase here

They all pull train, or just Tractor?

Can't hold a shotgun sidewise?

Hell if y’all were only down for 14 hours for a fishing job, it could have been a lot worse.

Here’s some names:

Faris - a company man I saw drop a flash light down the hole trying to look at the BOP from the rig floor during a trip after we pulled the rotating head. 7,500’ vertical with a curve landed on tens and drilled out 3 stands. Tripping to case/cement and then pick up slim tools to go back in and drill the production section.

Know what we did? Ran casing and cement and drilled ahead. Never saw that flashlight again. Cheap flashlight’s a lot different than a spud wrench, though. Those hands never let that company man live that down, either.

Company man said if he wanted to go fishing, he woulda took that hitch off and went offshore.



Jeddy - Speaking of the protected species, we had a worm hand on that rig named Jeddy that got his job because the pusher was dating his sister. Kid must have been 20 years old and weighed like 110. Nobody on the crew liked him. They were always trying to get him run off.

We’re picking up a 9 5/8” BHA one day and he’s tailing a monel in through the v-door and only had a single loop on it. They asked him if he was sure he had it and he said pick it up. Even with the elevators kicked out, that thing swung in and hit the stump. Pin threads were done. We didn’t have a spare on location so there’s this same company man out there with an angle grinder trying to re-cut the threads while we waited on another non-mag collar from town. He got them done to where he thought it was good enough and had the boys make it up and send it down hole. I kept waiting on that BHA to twist off but it never did. Pusher found out what happened and got onto the crew for letting that worm try to tail the collar in by himself.



Had a worm driller on that rig, too, but I can’t remember his name. I think it was David. Tripping pipe one day and he kicks the pumps on after racking one back with the block crowned out not screwed into anything since we were tripping with elevators. It was one of those good west Texas days where the wind was blowing about 700mph, too. My pickup was straight downwind. He covered half the location with OBM. My truck was brown from one end to the other. Then the crew that came out to clean everything scratched the paint to hell with the pressure washer hose covered in caliche dirt. XTO paid for new paint on my whole rig. Only thing they ever bought me. I can still find dried OBM under the hood if I look hard enough.

Here’s a few pictures, my truck isn’t supposed to have black wheels:

Ahhhhhh OBM. Offshore.

Top 4 oh chits....

4. Swivel packing going out on Varco top drive.

3. Mud pump pop offs weren’t plumbed anywhere. Can fug up a pump room quicker than hand can call driller on guitronics.

2. Worm shaker hand closed gates on ditch. Shakers were over running. Filled up ditch. And deck. Luckily didn’t go over kick plate.

1. Flow line came apart @ dresser sleeve under rig floor. Covered platform. And walkway and satellite platform.
Co man: did any go in the water?
Night Toolpusher: i don’t *think* so.
Co man: good deal. 😂 resumes watching Gunsmoke.

Just thought of another couple

“Devin and Dustin”

The moron twins


lol

I’ve seen 2 & 3. Except I was only on land rigs so when I saw #2, it just went all over the place from Maine to Spain. The crew was so jam up that the driller was the first one to catch it when his volume was off. Thought we were taking losses. We were. To the pad. Night hands were just down there in the change house watchin the world go by.

Man, that story about the Co man and the flow line coming apart made me remember this time we started taking gas at the shakers. Shut everything in and stopped while the gas crew came out. This co man had all the hands bring their box fans from their rooms and line them all around the porch to his trailer and hung a few sniffers out there and in his office so he didn’t have to leave his chair/tv and go to the muster point. Gas was so bad that the gas hand’s meter couldn’t read it. Pulled two vials from the shakers and couldn’t get a reading on the 2,000ppm test, the 10,000ppm test showed it around 6,500ppm.

But that co man wasn’t missing the Alabama game.