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Joined: Sep 2020
Posts: 759
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Sep 2020
Posts: 759 |
Swamp Ass is real. Wipe well and shower daily.
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 21,895 Likes: 7
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 21,895 Likes: 7 |
Can you get one that dispenses cold milk.
That might be nice after too many jalapenos!
Parents who say they have good kids..Usually don't!
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 3,278
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 3,278 |
Some real foofy-doos on here. We just recently tossed out the corn cobs and started using that new-fangled paper.
John Wayne would be mighty disappointed with y'all.
Haul ass, haul ass! - Pappy
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Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 2,171 Likes: 2
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 2,171 Likes: 2 |
Remsen,
Easy to see who has used one or not?
Bought one after elbow surgery to keep my wife from wiping my ass. No way in hell I’ll ever go back to toilet paper. No more monkey butt, [bleep] in your hand, clogged toilets and stuffed up septic tank from girls in the house, no skid marks, etc. etc. And best of all it ends an excuse from the wife to keep from bumping uglies cuz it sure keeps it clean!
Bought one for the price of two TP packs. Go cold water, warm water isn’t worth it. You’ll save a TON of money over TP.
Merry Christmas you stinky fuggers!
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 32,130 Likes: 1 |
Bidets were one of the themes at deer camp this year. Someone even sent me a Tushy link. It turned out to be the wrong Tushy, but people seemed to really like their bidets.
If you put Taco Bell sauce in your ramen noodles it tastes just like poverty
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,452 Likes: 15
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,452 Likes: 15 |
The only time a bidet doesn't work best is when you don't have running water.
“In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell
It's not over when you lose. It's over when you quit.
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,572 Likes: 2
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,572 Likes: 2 |
got the wife this one ![[Linked Image from i.imgur.com]](https://i.imgur.com/63JI560.png) took about 15 minutes to install and it works ,well hell, I don't know what to expect but its an ass washing sumbitch. Its essentially the jet setting on the garden hose nozzle, but it is adjustable.
Last edited by KFWA; 12/28/21.
have you paid your dues, can you moan the blues, can you bend them guitar strings
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,572 Likes: 2
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,572 Likes: 2 |
I told the wife I installed it, so she gave it a "dry run"' so to speak.
That cold water hit her and she yelled out "aaaaiiiiiii...it made me pee!"
have you paid your dues, can you moan the blues, can you bend them guitar strings
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,452 Likes: 15
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,452 Likes: 15 |
I mentioned earlier that if you want warm water, spend the money to get one with the heated tank. Otherwise, you sit there with cold water spraying up your butt while the hot is coming through the lines.
“In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell
It's not over when you lose. It's over when you quit.
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 13,827 Likes: 1
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 13,827 Likes: 1 |
We can't afford a bidet...
I have to stand on my head in the shower.
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 6,243 Likes: 17
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 6,243 Likes: 17 |
I told the wife I installed it, so she gave it a "dry run"' so to speak.
That cold water hit her and she yelled out "aaaaiiiiiii...it made me pee!" Picturing that almost made me pee
You've got to hand it to a blind prostitute
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 11,953
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 11,953 |
We can't afford a bidet...
I have to stand on my head in the shower. <LOL> 
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Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 4,875 Likes: 6
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 4,875 Likes: 6 |
SD23 bought one for Slavyanka for Christmas and I installed it yesterday. Sucker is powerful. Seems to work well.
Made the mistake of telling Slavyanka there was a warm water version, and now she’s whining that she would’ve preferred that, even if she had to sit there for 5 min waiting for warm water. :eyeroll:
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,452 Likes: 15
Campfire Kahuna
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Campfire Kahuna
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 69,452 Likes: 15 |
SD23 bought one for Slavyanka for Christmas and I installed it yesterday. Sucker is powerful. Seems to work well.
Made the mistake of telling Slavyanka there was a warm water version, and now she’s whining that she would’ve preferred that, even if she had to sit there for 5 min waiting for warm water. :eyeroll: I guarantee she wouldn't do that more than once.
“In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell
It's not over when you lose. It's over when you quit.
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,572 Likes: 2
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 23,572 Likes: 2 |
I mentioned earlier that if you want warm water, spend the money to get one with the heated tank. Otherwise, you sit there with cold water spraying up your butt while the hot is coming through the lines. I'd rather listen to her yell every time she uses it.
have you paid your dues, can you moan the blues, can you bend them guitar strings
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Joined: Mar 2020
Posts: 3,860 Likes: 2
Campfire Tracker
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Campfire Tracker
Joined: Mar 2020
Posts: 3,860 Likes: 2 |
If you get monkey butt you don't know how to clean your ass. There is water available from the nearby sink, or baby wipes.
That said, bidets work really well.
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 21,895 Likes: 7
Campfire Ranger
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Campfire Ranger
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 21,895 Likes: 7 |
If you get monkey butt you don't know how to clean your ass. There is water available from the nearby sink, or baby wipes.
That said, bidets work really well. My monkey ass is from sweat, not dingleberries. The dingleberries don't cause any trouble in December. #followthescience!
Parents who say they have good kids..Usually don't!
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 38,919 Likes: 10
Campfire 'Bwana
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Campfire 'Bwana
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 38,919 Likes: 10 |
Not a real member - just an ordinary guy who appreciates being able to hang around and say something once in awhile.
Happily Trapped In the Past (Thanks, Joe)
Not only a less than minimally educated person, but stupid and out of touch as well.
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 7,931 Likes: 3
Campfire Outfitter
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Campfire Outfitter
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 7,931 Likes: 3 |
If you learn how to pinch a loaf properly you don't need to spray the starfish.
Dogs manage to pinch one off properly for example.
GOA
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Joined: Apr 2017
Posts: 2,467
Campfire Regular
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Campfire Regular
Joined: Apr 2017
Posts: 2,467 |
Swing by a Sapp Brothers Truck Stop when you're in the area.
I'm here to increase my social credit score and rub elbows with some of the highest rollers on the internet.
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