Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire Suicide - feeling hollow

My brother in law committed suicide this past week. Really a caring, gentle, easy going guy with a good job and no addictions. No outward signs of what he was holding in or the troubles that he felt were insurmountable. Just the wrong personality to be in charge on his mothers affairs.

A brother and sister were very predatory on him. He went to a meeting with the Trustee and his brother -- never came home. Jumped from a bridge. Single income family with no kids. My sister will be having major adjustments to make going forward.

Just makes the saying you can pick your friends but not your family all the more true. Helping my sister through the estate paperwork --- just makes me feel hollow. Tragic, senseless and avoidable. Sometimes in the long run it is just better to say no to family requests and move on.

In the job I retired from I had to deal with a number of student suicides -- I could never understand the depth of dispair / torment that would cause a person to take this route. I still do not understand this.

Hugh;
I am so very sorry to read of this sir.

Ugh.

Your wife, you and those left behind are in my thoughts and prayers.

That's so tough to read and again I'm so sorry.

Dwayne

Very sorry.

Hard not to judge....but a person has to try not to.


Good luck.

I feel your pain. I've been in your shoes to a certain degree and wish you patience and fortitude. It sucks but you have to do the best you can.

Sorry to hear this, Hugh. It seems that in times like these no real logic or reason applies.

May you and your family find peace.

A situation i have no experience with....sorry for your family's pain...


Prayers sent....

Hugh, you and your sister will be in my prayers.
7mm

Sorry for your pain/loss. Had a hunting buddy kill himself this year. It was very unexpected and it took some time for the shock to wear off.

Sorry to hear. Been through this before. Not much i can say to ease the pain

Hugh, so very sorry to hear of you BIL’s death. Everyone has their own demons to battle. Please know that your family is in our prayers.

damn , I feel your pain found my best friend since childhood in 2008 with his brains splattered on his deck ...

Very sorry to hear that, no words can truly comfort in time like this.

Sorry for your loss.

I lost a brother in law to suicide too, I never tried to understand it.

All you can do is be there for your Sister at this point

Family support for everyone affected.

Sorry for your and your sisters loss

Yep…..
This is the one area where my opinion/thinking has changed greatly in 24 years.

George

Suicide is a hard thing to deal with. Been a cop for over twenty years and have lost many friends to it. Most were also combat vets. I've had the intrusive thoughts, gone a little ways down the rabbit hole. It seems like a relief, just to not have to fu*k with the BS anymore. I understand it but don't wish it on anyone. It's, in my experience, a spur of the moment decision. Pissed, depressed, tired, the hell with it, I'm popping smoke. sorry for your loss and wish you luck with your wife, she's got a big hill to climb. If you need someone to bounce stuff off of feel free to PM me. I've got some experience but more importantly, I've got some good contacts if you feel she needs them.
Patrick

I have lost both a close friend and my closest cousin to suicide. One committed suicide before his brain deteriorated into making him into a vegetable. I can only speculate about the other death - we really don’t know why he made his choice - none of us saw it coming.

Allow yourself and your family plenty of time to grieve. Talk about it when you need to. Cry when you need to.

It's your sister that my thoughts and prayers are with. Sometimes suicide is a selfish act when people don't consider how it will impact their family.

But I've known of times when it was a selfless act when people did consider how their family would be impacted. One of my wife's uncles had fought hard to beat cancer once. A few years later it came back. On the morning he was supposed to go to the hospital for surgery he decided to end his life on his terms to spare his family.

I've known of many others who took their own lives. A college buddy whose son saw too much in his 3 tours in Afghanistan. A father who cheated on his wife and couldn't live with himself even though his wife forgave him. A mom dying of cancer who killed her 11-year-old son then herself to make sure her ex didn't get custody of the boy.

It happens more often than we realize.

I am very sorry for your loss.

That is tough. My prayers are with you and your family.