Home Forums Hunting & Shooting Hunter's Campfire The Great Texas Coon War!

ROFLMAO!

"Knowing New Orleans city folks like you do, I'm sure you'd appreciate that one."

Last time I was there and on my way to Chalmette I remember seeing a sign in the yard of a house there next to the industrial canal drawbridge, "Coons for Sale"....

LOL! Never forget that!!!!!!!

Kaywoodie

A few years back the little bastards found the feed in my barn. Instead of ripping open 1 bag and eating from it they ripped open every one that was exposed (15 or so). Crapped and pissed everywhere.

2 live traps have thinned them out considerably. A sprinkle of cat food lures them inside. WV coons have not wised up yet. Interestingly though, this year has mostly seen young ones.

Fly bait mixed with grape juice works wonders. Critters drop within 5 feet of the dish. Problem is it kills indiscriminately. Fear for local pets has kept me from using this method although others find it very successful.

The magazine Fur Fish and Game advertises a trap that catches the coons front leg as he reaches in for the bait. IIRC ad states it is pet safe. I may give one a try someday.

Skirmishes are also occurring in the fine state of Idaho. Defenders in this locale have made effective use of live traps baited with "Little Friskies".

POW's may easily be enticed to nibble upon the muzzle of a Savage Striker in 17 HMR, which ends their combat career.

Defenders have called in canine reinforcements. A Jack Russel Terrier does effectively maintain a clear perimeter.

I have found it even more amusing to watch the dog chasing the varmints out of the yard than it is to shoot them. The dog has recently been vaccinated for rabies and gets a monthly dose of "Fipro-guard" to prevent transfer of external parasites.

We got lots of coons here also; 98% on welfare!!

Groan

+1!



Two excellent Ideas!

Gen Jubilation T Cornpone Sir,

Nothing to report over night here on the frontier.

All quiet and no probes.

They seem to have discovered my reach and stayed out of range.

Beware a flanking movement in you area.

Your Obt Svt,
Gen B Neu Sance.

Gen. I beg to report that flanking movement discovered.
The miscreant mudsill #8 is in durance vile and awaits a blind fold and a smoke.

I am going to go smoke him in a minute.

Y'r Ob't Sv't

Cornpone

Used to see signs like that every year we'd go back down to the Houston Fatstock show off south 288 and beltway 8 area...

General Cornpone Sir,

Far North outpost reporting. Have recently discovered 3 of the enemy scaling a fruit bearing tree. Suspect them of trying to breach perimeter by going over wire.

Ended threat immediately upon discovery. Can report that .44 special makes noticeable impression upon enemy. Shot placement not critical, large margin of error useful on fleeing enemy targets.

Next report will follow next enemy contact.

Respectfully,

Pvt. Property

With the thanks of a greatful nation, raise that man to corporal.


Gen. Cornpone

Try Remington Sub-Sonic LR HP's. They don't break the sound barrier and don't make that much noise. And, they're accurate, more so than some of the other stuff. I use them with my suppressor.

DF

CHEM/BIO WARFARE PLAN:

Depends on you morals but Golden Marlin fly pellets and Pepsi in a tin pie pan. A person I knew had them chewing up wiring in very expensive earth movers. Made a "dessert pan" for them. No BS he left it for 3 days and had 10 dead 'Coons! Draw a ten foot circle around plate. NOTHING will make it out of the circle. Just be sure nothing you like can get to it. They cant resist the stuff.

I heartily concur.

Gen. Neu Sance

Well, the camera showed what I thought wasn't there too bad. Showed I have 4 resident coons. But mostly they eat what the deer drop out of the feeder.

I'll get with them during bow season though I suspect.

At least its not tons of them. So many deer tracks I guess the deer tracks wipe out the tracks of the coons by the time I go look.

I dispatched # 10 this am. They have kind of slowed down.

I have relaxed the sentries and one slipped past the pickets last night. The dog ran it of of his feed dish about midnight. I'll go back on full alert tonight and re-set the trap.

Been eerily quiet on our front, I know they are laying back and plotting. Word might be afoot that I am in process of acquiring the latest state of the art sniper rifle in .243 Win.

Gn'l Neu Sance

Gen. Cornpone,

It is with urgency that I write of the latest development.

The enemy has recruited scouts from another species to throw us off course.

My Wardog/Sentry alerted me to intruders and I discovered two B.A.R.'s (Big Ass Rats) probing the defenses around the birdfeeders last night. One succumbed to a .22CB long and the other was dispatched by my War Dog, Lady, pictured below.


The Sgt. Maj. has informed me that if I deploy Golden Malrin around our post that R&R will become a thing of the past.

Y'r Ob't Sv't

Maj. Malfunction

Been eerily quiet on our front, I know they are laying back and plotting. Word might be afoot that I am in process of acquiring the latest state of the art sniper rifle in .243 Win.

Gn'l Neu Sance