I understand OP. I kissed my wife goodbye before going fishing one morning and was a widower by noon. She died in a traffic accident. Married 40 years. I was in a stupor for several months. Eventually worked my way out thanks to good friends and my faith in Christ. Now remarried and starting to enjoy life again. There is a light at the end of your tunnel. I suggest you find a grief support group such as GriefShare. Best of luck.
