Two more:

The ex-wife was in the habit of asking me asinine questions all the time, which irritated me to no end. Once, I was sitting on the couch trying to relax while drinking a fine single malt Scotch & watching a movie. My ex positioned herself between me and the TV and asked me some idiotic question. Irritated, I hiked a leg and farted violently and then asked her if that answered her question. The look of incredulity, disgust and begrudging amusement on her face was priceless.

Another time, back in High School English class, my best bud ripped an epic fart and the odor was so horrific, the teacher had to stop class, open all the windows and we all had to evacuate the classroom for 15 to 20 minutes.

Last edited by High_Noon; 09/20/19.

l told my pap and mam I was going to be a mountain man; acted like they was gut-shot. Make your life go here. Here's where the peoples is. Mother Gue, I says, the Rocky Mountains is the marrow of the world, and by God, I was right.
- Del Gue