Got a few wrecked some stuff in construction causing lots of $$$ n damage but I like this one best.
Testifying in court against scum bag I arrested for felony embezzlement six figure case.
Had to wait several hours for procedural court BS in the court coffee shop. Needless to say after many cups of coffee needed to take a whiz.
As I'm drowning the piss biscuit I get the call to head to court. Put rufus back in the dog house but forgot to close the door.
No big deal walking around. Unfortunately sitting this courtroom witness stand had a low wall infront so everything visible from knees up.
Yup you guessed it sat down dockers opened up and red plaid boxers on full display to court unknown to me. Until the Lady DDA jumped up walked briskly to chair to quietly inform me. I immediately standup walk to interview room stage Left with her in tow so as to provide cover of consultation.
Clear the door and go to zip in one motion. Wrong move should have waited till I stopped walking, Hairy ball sack jumped the curb and fold of skin got caught in midzip. Eyes teared up and I gaze up just as shes gazing down to see the semi castration taking place. Oh yeah big gasp from her with beet red face apologizing for looking. I clear the breach without a word and head to bathroom to wrap the boys in a few layers of wood pulp to stop the bleeding.
15 minute recess, then back on stand. Poor Lady DDA could hardly look at me while going through my testimony.
And yeah the story made the rounds in the Courthouse as I heard later from a cousin who was a DA Investigator at the time.
Howls of laughter mostly from women when I told the tale after many drinks at parties decades ago.
Last time I wore boxers as well.
