I remember the drill sergeant set ups most of all, and it was hell to keep from laughing in ranks (another death sentence).
That brings one of my own experiences to mind..
We had time to kill, drill sgt was handing out mail, he'd call your name and them just throw it over his shoulder.. and you ran up and picked it up off the ground..
one of ours was a skinny Rodney Dangerfield wannbe.. so he'd tell jokes, that were pretty darn funny...
so he called closed ranks, and I couldn't quit laughing and chuckling from his last joke... he sees me and calls open ranks, and then walks right up to me and puts his nose about 1/4 from my chin ( he was shorter than I) and yells 'what are you so happy about trainee???'
(This drill really liked me as we both had family roots in the same county in VA..plus I was college educated among a bunch of morons)..
So the first thing that goes thru my mind is to say something snappy... so I come out with " Because its a FINE DAY to be in the Army Drill Sgt!!" he steps back with a big grin on his face... and yells out " so its a fine day to be in the Army?" "yes Drill Sgt!"
He walks back to the front of the platoon..." SO ITS A FINE DAY TO BE IN THE ARMY TRAINEE??"
" YES DRILL SGT!!"
Drill: " So let me ask you this Pvt... Did you get laid today???"
Me: " NO DRILL SGT!"
Drill: " I hope you didn't get laid last night trainee, because that either meant you went AWHOL last night or you're a GD Queer!...."
Drill.. " Did you go AWOL last night Trainee!!!"
Me: "NO DRILL SGT!!"
Drill: "ARE YOU A G.Damn QUEER TRAINEE!"
Me: "NO DRILL SGT!"
Drill: "DID YOU GET PAID TODAY TRAINEE???"
Me: " NO DRILL SGT!"
Drill: "WELL IF YOU DIDN'T GET LAID LAST NIGHT, AND YOU DIDN'T GET PAID TODAY, THEN IT ISN'T A 'FINE DAY' TO BE IN THE ARMY!! NOW GET UP HERE AND GIVE ME 20!!"
so I run up and pound out 20...
Drill: 'RECOVER AND AT EASE TRAINEE!!"
me: "YES DRILL SGT!"
Drill: " NOW THE REST OF YOU RAGASS M.F.'S... IS IT A FINE DAY TO BE IN THE ARMY??"
Rest of the Platoon.." NO DRILL SGT"...
Drill: "WHY YOU RAGASSED BUNCH OF COMMUNISTIC UNPATRIOTIC BUNCH OF M.F's!!!! GET DOWN!!!!"
Drill: " Call it out for these douche bags Trainee!!!"
me.. "yes Drill Sgt!!"
after they are done..
Drill: " SO IS IT A FINE DAY TO BE IN THE ARMY???"
Platoon: " YES DRILL SGT!!!"
Drill Sgt: "DID YOU GET LAID LAST NIGHT???"
