I'd go over to www.tacomaworld.com and read up on some of the comments. I have no 1st hand experience with the new 3.5, but my 2007 with the 4.0 has been bulletproof.

You won't get a consensus. Most of the guys with the 3.5 are happy, but a lot of guys coming from the 4.0 to the 3.5 don't. They both have similar torque and HP ratings, but the new 3.5 needs 4600 rpm to get max torque. The older 4.0 does it at 3500 rpm. Which is still high, but a lot better than 4600. Based on what I'm reading the 3.5 does OK, you just have to drive it differently.

Most people don't really want the truth.

They just want constant reassurance that what they believe is the truth.