I am no grizzly expert but the highly suggested, first order defense -- a spray can -- for a quarter horse-fast, quarter-ton, very annoyed omnivore hurtling at a slow, ungainly and small biped has to have its nexus with a conference room of liberal-thinking, bobble-headed wildlife officials.

It might best and most safely be applied generously around the beast's nose and head soon after a cylinder full of hard casts was first -- these hard casts are less affected by the breeze in your face and won't be mistaken for self-applied Cajun, pepper rub.