? Geez, I grew up in the woods. Y' want a 30 page essay, or do you want the long version? Lemme think of a couple that were particularly .. interesting.
One time I snuck up on a forked horn and poked him with my rifle barrel. He 'bout ran me over trying to escape.
I had a gray squirrel mistake me for a stump .. seemed to sense something was wrong and he ran up me to take a look around. You could read "oh [bleep]" in its eyes.
One time I was fishing, wearing thin nylon and split leather running shoes, and something started tapping on my foot. I looked down and saw about an 8 inch rattlesnake trying to bite me, fortunately, he was hitting the leather and not the nylon.
One year I was walking home about dusk from a hunt and the trail was blocked ... there was a bear in the brush with just its head sticking out into the trail. Because of a wall of stickers on the other side of the trail, I had to pass within 16-18 inches of that bear's teeth, within easy claw range. No real way around, so I pulled the .44 (handgun hunting), thumbed the hammer back, and went past the bear with the muzzle about 3 inches from contact. That sucker never moved other than to just track me with its eyes. Spooky.
Few years ago I was muzzleloader hunting and found what I thought was a crippled bird in an skid road in an old clear cut. I watched it for a while. Eventually I walked over, it didn't fly, so I picked it up. I carried it around for a few minutes in my hand, then set it back down. If flew off. I have no idea why it let me do that.
Uh, one time I was backpacking. Ran out of jerky about day 3. 3 more days of ramen noodles. I was ready for meat. I woke up the last morning with a [bleep] sittin' on my chest. I caught myself mid-swing with a Buck General .. I was gonna pin the little SOB to myself and eat him. I decided it was time to head back to town for a cheeseburger.
Then .. I've had some weird [bleep] happen.
Like the time I had some sort of big cat, I think, in "camp". Coast range, SW Oregon. 25 yards or less, still daylight. I only saw the back half as it went into the brush, but it looked to be at least 300 pounds, probably bigger, had a short, stiff, 6-8 inch stub of a tail, and the knees bent the wrong way for a cat. Short, sleek hair, like a dachshund, but more of a lighter butterscotch color. On my home turf ... I know pretty near every critter there and all the big ones, but I just plain dunno WTF that was. Disturbing.
I could keep going all afternoon ...
