Sorry to hear about your situation. Can't add much to what's been said, but it takes two people to make a marriage work, and counseling won't do anything if both spouses aren't interested in making it work.
I've found women need two primary things in a relationship. One is security (both physical and emotional), sounds like you've provided the material needs, but the emotional nurturing, it sounds like she wasn't able to get and you haven't seemed to realize she needs just as much as if not more so than the material needs.
Trust me, you can say, "Woman, why aren't you happy I've provided every material thing you could possibly want." and that will assuredly get you at best the stink eye.
Women have a need to bitch and moan about things they can't or won't fix, and that you most assuredly you can't fix. A male response to this is, why are we wasting time yabbering about something we can't change? 180 degrees out of what the woman needs. She needs to know you care about her by spending time listening to her complaints and not blowing them off as a waste of your time. And if you spend the time listening to her, you'll have an understanding of her needs and over time be able to find out what is really bugging her.
If this comes as a complete shock to you, then IMHO you've been quite blind to your wife's needs for a long time and you've been ignoring glaring signs that the flame has been flickering for some time. None of my business, but I'd find it hard to believe you're still making mad passionate love daily or at least weekly and your wife suddenly says she no longer loves you.
