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Don,
Used to be an ad that touted �Texas, a whole �nother place. The state has a very diverse topography and population. Flat plains up around Amarillo, high desert in the Big Bend, hardwood and pine in the east, bayou country, and marsh near the coast and brush country in south Texas. Folks of every stripe,color, nationality and creed. I�d bet you could find something to your liking other than our lack of public hunting land. Your definitely welcome anytime you�d like to visit.
I understand what you say about your wife not wanting to leave because of a grandchild. I now have a 4-1/2 year old grandson. Due to circumstances, we have kept this young man at least four days a week in the afternoons near since he was born. It is a special time for me as I am coming full circle. I am getting to do all the things my grandfather did with me when I was a little boy. I can�t imagine moving away and giving that up. Selfish of me, but what the hey, everybody�s gotta be somewhere. Having roots can be a good thing. Make the most of it.
It�s a slow morning and though it may sound preachy, perhaps I can relate the following stream of consciousness.
If I ever wrote a book, I would title it, A Farmer Looks at Life. One portion would be devoted to �The seasons of a man�s life.� One sub chapter might be titled , �You can be a squash in six weeks or a mighty oak in 100 years�.
I am a believer that a man�s life has its seasons.
During the spring of my life, I was much more of a seeker/searcher and much more adventurous and ambitious than today. I undertook to study the philosophies that governed how men dealt with their existence
I had grown up reading the classics, Norse and Greek mythology, Zane Grey, Hemingway. During my early twenties, over a period of several years I read books by authors such as Goethe, Kafka, Hesse, Vonnegut, Carlos Casteneda, Heinlein, Bradbury. They left me pretty empty.
During my late twenties I had a Christian conversion. A foundational book I read was one written by James W Sire, who at that time was president of Intervarsity Press. It was titled, The Universe Next Door, ( a basic world view catalogue). It briefly described the philosophies of Diesm, Christian Theism, Naturalism, Existentialism/Nihilism/, Eastern Pantheistic Monism, and the �New (or at that time Drug) Consciousness. Being familiar with all these philosophies from the reading I had done during the last 10 years, I bought into Christian theism. It has served me in good stead, accept the vissicitudes of life and enjoy life on
As an example��..
The existentialist/nihilist will say, �Why are we all born to suffer and die.� With the answer, �why not�, FU if you can�t take a joke�
HD Thoreau is purported to have penned the maxim, �Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.�
Not me, I make sure I can bitch and moan to any and every-one in my circle of friends, family and whoever I can come in contact with. As an aside and in keeping with life having seasons, I find that the older I get, the more my circle of acquaintances tends to shrink. One needs to constantly strive to enlarge that circle. You can do this by acquiring new interests and seeking out folk that have those interests in common. Over a period of time one will earn the right to bitch and moan,
Don�t know if you ever read the book by RA Heinlein, �Stranger in a Strange Land�. The protagonist was a fellow named Michael Valentine Smith. IIRC, he was the only survivor of a Mars exploration team, and was the son of the leader of that team and his wife. He was raised on Mars by Martians. The Martians didn�t bury their dead. Rather the family ate their family members after death. They called it �Groking in fullness�. Perhaps you�ve heard the term. Anyway, when MWS comes back to earth one of the thing he can�t understand, never having been around human beings, is why people laugh. After a period of observation, he decided that humans laugh at others misfortune. For example a person smashes his thumb with a hammer. Folks that are around immediately laugh. The guy with the smashed thumb is not �happy�.
So segue into happiness versus joy. The word happy IIRC is derived from the greek �hap� or chance. So you could postulate that our happiness is subject to the �vicissitudes or �changes and chances� of life. Joy is being at peace with your creator.

A wise man once penned something along the lines of the following words
Remember [earnestly] also your Creator [that you are not your own, but His property now] in the days of your youth, before the evil days come or the years draw near when you will say [of physical pleasures], I have no enjoyment in them�
Before the sun and the light and the moon and the stars are darkened [sight is impaired], and the clouds [of depression] return after the rain [of tears];
In the day when the keepers of the house [the hands and the arms] tremble, and the strong men [the feet and the knees] bow themselves, and the grinders [the molar teeth] cease because they are few, and those who look out of the windows [the eyes] are darkened;
When the doors [the lips] are shut in the streets and the sound of the grinding [of the teeth] is low, and one rises up at the voice of a bird and the crowing of a cock, and all the daughters of music [the voice and the ear] are brought low;
Also when [the old] are afraid of danger from that which is high, and fears are in the way, and the almond tree [their white hair] blooms, and the grasshopper [a little thing] is a burden, and desire and appetite fail, because man goes to his everlasting home and the mourners go about the streets or marketplaces.
[Remember your Creator earnestly now] before the silver cord [of life] is snapped apart, or the golden bowl is broken, or the pitcher is broken at the fountain, or the wheel broken at the cistern [and the whole circulatory system of the blood ceases to function];
Then shall the dust [out of which God made man�s body] return to the earth as it was, and the spirit shall return to God Who gave it.
Vapor of vapors and futility of futilities, says the Preacher. All is futility (emptiness, falsity, vainglory, and transitoriness)!
And furthermore, because the Preacher was wise, he [Solomon] still taught the people knowledge; and he pondered and searched out and set in order many proverbs.
The Preacher sought acceptable words, even to write down rightly words of truth or correct sentiment.
The words of the wise are like prodding goads, and firmly fixed [in the mind] like nails are the collected sayings which are given [as proceeding] from one Shepherd.
But about going further [than the words given by one Shepherd], my son, be warned. Of making many books there is no end [so do not believe everything you read], and much study is a weariness of the flesh.
All has been heard; the end of the matter is: Fear God [revere and worship Him, knowing that He is] and keep His commandments, for this is the whole of man [the full, original purpose of his creation, the object of God�s providence, the root of character, the foundation of all happiness, the adjustment to all inharmonious circumstances and conditions under the sun] and the whole [duty] for every man.
For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it is good or evil. (Ecclesiastes 12)

One more, from the same fellow.........
To everything there is a season, and a time for every matter or purpose under heaven:
A time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to pluck up what is planted,
A time to kill and a time to heal, a time to break down and a time to build up,
A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
A time to cast away stones and a time to gather stones together, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
A time to get and a time to lose, a time to keep and a time to cast away,
A time to rend and a time to sew, a time to keep silence and a time to speak,
A time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
What profit remains for the worker from his toil?
I have seen the painful labor and exertion and miserable business which God has given to the sons of men with which to exercise and busy themselves.
He has made everything beautiful in its time. He also has planted eternity in men�s hearts and minds [a divinely implanted sense of a purpose working through the ages which nothing under the sun but God alone can satisfy], yet so that men cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.
I know that there is nothing better for them than to be glad and to get and do good as long as they live;
And also that every man should eat and drink and enjoy the good of all his labor�it is the gift of God.
I know that whatever God does, it endures forever; nothing can be added to it nor anything taken from it. And God does it so that men will [reverently] fear Him [revere and worship Him, knowing that He is].
That which is now already has been, and that which is to be already has been; and God seeks that which has passed by [so that history repeats itself].
Moreover, I saw under the sun that in the place of justice there was wickedness, and that in the place of righteousness wickedness was there also.
I said in my heart, God will judge the righteous and the wicked, for there is a time [appointed] for every matter and purpose and for every work.
I said in my heart regarding the subject of the sons of men, God is trying (separating and sifting) them, that they may see that by themselves [under the sun, without God] they are but like beasts.
For that which befalls the sons of men befalls beasts; even [in the end] one thing befalls them both. As the one dies, so dies the other. Yes, they all have one breath and spirit, so that a [a]man has no preeminence over a beast; for all is vanity (emptiness, falsity, and futility)!
All go to one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.
Who knows the spirit of man, whether it goes upward, and the spirit of the beast, whether it goes downward to the earth?
So I saw that there is nothing better than that a man should rejoice in his own works, for that is his portion. For who shall bring him back to see what will happen after he is gone? (Ecclesiastes 3)

Consequently, I am at peace with my creator, and I�ve learned to take pleasure in the simple things of life, here and now, for as the preacher says, that�s all that a �natural man� living under the sun can do. I would encourage you to enjoy the wife of your youth, your children, grandchildren and friends. Help where you can (realizing that no good deed goes unpunished. LOL) make new friends and undertake to make each day an adventure. It has worked for this guy.
Best

GWB