The wife looked out the window and said, is that an animal out there? Sure enough, there was vermin at the new place. I grabbed the .22 and snuck out the front and around the corner of the garage. Settled the crosshairs on the head and for a split second, just before I squeezed the trigger I thought, man, that woodchuck looks a lot like Nancy Pelosi, only cuter. Crack and Nancy disappeared. One look down the hole confirmed that the .22 had done its job, right through the noodle. The garbage truck picked up Nancy this morning and she is on her way to the landfill. I felt slightly better.


What you do today is important, you are trading a day in the rest of your life for it.